Kaleidoscope

Chapter Fifteen

"What's going on, bud," Jen asked when she saw her brother the next day.

"I don't want to talk about it, Jen."

"When did the drugs start?" she asked.

Danny's eyes grew wide and he shuddered. Tears formed in the corners and he started to shake.

"A little while ago," he answered, realizing he hadn't fooled her one bit.

"Was school too tough?" she asked beginning to pry a little, but knowing if she pushed too much he would push back and shut down.

"It wasn't that. I don't know—it was everything."

"You can talk to me, Danny."

"I don't even know where to begin, Jen. I just fell in with the wrong crowd. I guess I was looking for something—some place to belong. I obviously chose wrong. Anyway, I'm in trouble."

Jen tread lightly with her next words. "You need to get some help, Danny. I know a clinic nearby you could go to. You can't do this on your own. And you need someone to talk to—not me. I'm too close."

"I can't do it. I'm wrecked."

"Do it for yourself. I'll go with you if you want. You need this."

Danny knew she was right. He remembered what the coach had said about not wasting his life. He had squandered all the good in himself, and for what? Just so he could get high on pills. But, counseling would make him dig deep and he didn't know if he could do that.

"I'll think about it, sis. I just know that it hurts so bad sometimes."

Jen reached for her brother's thin body and pulled him I close. "You can do this," she whispered.

Danny's life seemed to close in on him. He didn't know if his hurt was on the outside or in. His body ached with addiction pangs and his heart hurt with lost dreams. If only he could shine a flashlight inside himself and see where all the hurt was maybe he could find a way out for all the pain he was suffering. He wanted an upper right now to make the pain go away and he knew where he could get some. He wasn't that naïve not to know how many kids were on them in high school. Just a few more, he thought, just enough to give me the courage to do what I know I should do. He left Jen and headed for his old high school to wait outside.