Kaleidoscope

Chapter Twenty-two

Rose walked in the door, threw her keys on the table and flopped down on the kitchen chair, a weight crushing her into the rungs of the ladder back. Tom wanted to come home to the family. She knew Danny needed his dad right now and Theresa wanted them to get back together again. A whole lot would have to change before she would even entertain the thought. She wondered why the idea of it all was so hard.

She went to see Theresa but the door to her room was closed and she didn't want to disturb her. At a loss for what to do, she walked down the hallway, her steps hushed on the carpet. They had wanted to take the carpet up to make it easier for Theresa's wheelchair but she said she wanted to manage on her own.

Her thoughts turned to Danny. He had been disappearing lately and she knew he wasn't always going to work. He still hadn't opened up very much about his withdrawal from school. She thought he was settling in back home, but part of her knew that he wanted to return to Amherst. Another one wanting to get away from home. She wondered what she was doing wrong. Tom certainly had some opinions but she hadn't wanted to hear them. She was mourning the family she used to have like the death of someone close, and it hurt.

Theresa finally came down the hall to see her mom staring into space. She stalled a moment before asking her mom how the therapy session had gone. She was met with silence. She guessed it had not gone well. It would take time. She could attest to that.

Danny came in just then and was met with a wall of dead air. Something was going on but he was afraid to ask. He just nodded his head and went off to his room and closed the door.

After a time, Rose snapped out of her funk and called Jen. Here was one of her children who seemed to have it all together. She was very involved in her studies and, as with everything she ever did, she was succeeding and would have her degree by the end of the year. She would finally accomplish her dream of being a Physician's Assistant. That would be cause for a celebration and lord knew they needed something to celebrate.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the solitude of his room, Danny tried to piece together his life. He had failed at the one thing he thought would keep him sane—being on his own. All it had gotten him was hooked on drugs. He was an addict—at least that was what they told him at the clinic. A recovering one, but an addict nonetheless. Every time he walked into the clinic, instead of feeling a boost of confidence for his efforts, he saw himself as a failure. He couldn't place the blame on anyone but himself. Oh, he had tried to blame Theresa and his parents, but the fact was he was weak and was easily swayed when he was on his own. He rolled around on his bed desperately wanting some pills. He was sober for now, but the temptation was still so strong. He just wanted to feel good, even for a little while. Then he would quit. But, that would mean another failure. His conscience and his craving were having a wrestling match. Exhausted, he got up and left the house. He knew where he had to go.