Light Upon Light

#37 The Day of Confessions

السلام عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته
Hey people. I know it's been more than a month since the last update, but here's a new chapter. I hope you guys enjoy reading it.

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#37 The Day of Confessions

Post Zaid's appearance I pretty much stayed within my room. I knew he and Iqra Di wouldn't stay long but being cautious wouldn't hurt me a bit. I was still angry with him and annoyed as well and confused. And with such a mixture of feelings I wouldn't be able to stay composed in his presence.

The one good that came out of his arrival was the perfect excuse to complete my notes and study. Not that I hated studies or something. It was an excellent to focus and forget all those unwanted distractions. Samir jokingly said once that my web history was probably composed entirely of Wikipedia. He wasn't entirely wrong.

Samar had brought me notes from Lia and topics for assignments and other home works. That kept me busy and I was nearly done with it all when Mom called. An awful feeling crept into the pit of my stomach. We've become quite comfortable talking to each other off late, but just then I wanted to decline her call.

'Assalamualaikum Mom,' I greeted as I moved away from my desk to the window seat.

'Wa alaikumasalaam Juni, how are you dear?' She asked and I pictured her pushing her fringe away with a small smile on her face.

'Alhamdulilah, I'm well.'

'Wedding preps have begun I hear,' Mom remarked.

'Yep, how's Muscat? You're gonna be there for long?' She had gone to Oman for a series of lectures a few days back. She calls me on a weekly basis or fortnightly these days. The last time she called was the day she left for Muscat.

'Muscat is pleasant. I'll be leaving tonight in sha Allah,' Mom replied as I played with the tassels on my top. This random casual chatter did nothing to ease the conflict within me.

To tell or not to tell … to tell or not to tell …

'Mom there's something you need to know,' I blurted out before I lost confidence and shut up like a clam.

'Is everything okay Juni? Did that Azhar boy do something again?' Before she could fire any more questions, I explained everything that happened. I started pacing in front of my bed soon enough. She remained silent as I spoke and I was afraid of that more than an angry outburst.

'And I've been suspended for two days. I'll be heading back to school the day after tomorrow.' I concluded exhaling heavily.

Mom has not said a word since I started talking except to ask me if I got the wound on my hand dressed properly by a doctor. I told her I'll go visit the local dispensary tomorrow with Chachu.

I waited for sometime for her to respond. When she didn't my heart dropped down to my stomach. 'Mom, you there?' I asked as I crushed a cushion on the sofa.

'Yeah… yeah. I am. I just … I'm so overwhelmed by a that you've told me. I'm still processing it all.' She responded, her voice sounding distant.

'Are you … angry with me?' I mumbled, choking back the tears that had sprung out of nowhere.

'No. No, no… a little disappointed but not angry. I'm actually glad you decided to tell me yourself. Javed probably would not have told me thinking I'd berate you for it.' Mom sighed.

I sat down on the sofa pressing the phone close to my ear. For once I wished to hug my Mom but she was so far away.

'Actually Dad wanted to tell you. He didn't do so because Dadi told him not to. I guess she knew or wanted me to tell you myself.' I mused.