My demons (book 1)

We are on the same side

After Aisha had calmed down she had decided to go home and talk to Jay. Drawing knowledge form their past arguments, she was fairly sure he had calmed down by then and stopped being so stubborn. She was growing tired of fighting him about the same topic. She knew he was just trying to protect her, but he needed to realise, he was protecting her from the wrong enemy. And he needed to realise it sooner rather than later.

He was waiting for her outside her house and asked her to join him on a walk. Dread started creeping inside her chest and she swallowed thickly before nodding, following him down the empty road to the seemingly infinite forest she had found solace during every sleepless night she had spent missing her mother, every rough day she had spent hating her dad, herself, or both at once. The forest she had been abducted in and hadn't visited since. Seeing it again and walking through it gave her chills that had little to do with the gentle breeze. They made it to a clearing she had favoured on sunny days; the spot was perfect for cloud gazing. She was afraid her boyfriend is about to ruin that spot for her. Sighing, she pulled to a stop when she felt him slowing his steps. He stepped in front of her, eyes cast past her face, far into the distance. "Aisha, I have been thinking..."

"Well, that's rare. Did it hurt?" she tried to tease, hoping it will lighten up the mood.

"Don't..." his voice got lost in the wind as he continued to look past her.

"You are scaring me," she admitted, unable to keep her voice from trembling. Deep down she knew what will come next but no amount of knowledge could ease the pain his next words brought.

"Aisha, babe, I love you. And I have been so selfish with you because of it. You and I both know I'm nothing but a danger to you. I'm the biggest threat you can face right now and I refuse to continue endangering you. I can't be selfish with you anymore. I'm sorry."

"What...what are you even saying?" she stuttered out, desperately searching for his eyes. To see them sparkle as he gave her a smirk and tell her he was just joking. But his eyes are empty, the green forest appeared to be burned down, reflecting none of its' usual richness. She longed for the golden flecks that could usually be spotted in his green iris', longed for the softness and love so visible in his gaze.

"This has to end baby girl. Us...we are over, it's all over," she heard his voice that was lowered down to a near whisper. She could hear the pain in his voice but it did nothing to soothe her own.

She wanted to beg him not to go, to yell at him that he was making a mistake, she wanted to tell him how much she needed him...but no words came out against the lump in her throat. All she managed was a nod as she focused all of her energy to not crumble down in front of him, willing her tears not to spill.

He gently kissed her forehead before walking away, leaving her alone in the forest. Finally, the first tear fell.

Her body felt like it was on fire, aching pain filling her every pore as her demons started screaming louder than ever. She didn't know how much longer she would be able to fight them, she didn't know how much she even still wanted to stop them. All she wanted to do was escape; her mind, her feelings, herself.

She started running far, far away as her demons started bombarding her with memories of Jay. Every kiss, every touch, every look, it burned against her skin as if his every touch left a scar in its' wake. Her entire body ached and there seemed to be a gaping hole where her heart used to be, making it hard for her to concentrate on anything but the hollowness of her chest.

Everything was faded; the road, the trees, the sky. The only thing loud and clear were the screams inside her head threatening to overpower her. She just kept running.

But suddenly, she stopped.

She was done. Done fighting. She was exhausted and her entire body was screaming at her to just let go. She lay down on the ground, closing her eyes. She was ready. She could feel her demon consuming her and for the first time, she didn't fight back. She felt power running through her veins, soothing the pain as it moved from her head down to her toes.

She got up from the floor and started making her way out of the forest. This time, no one was going to stop her, not even herself.

She arrived to her house in a matter of minutes, grateful the night had already fallen. She felt safer in the dark. Quickly surveying her surroundings, she had briefly wondered how long will it take for Alina to connect the dots and try to help her. But she didn't want her help. She didn't need it.

Suddenly she heard Jay's calls in the back of her mind, but she had no intention of listening to him. "You left, remember? Now stay away," she hissed before shutting him out.

Shortly after Alina's yells filled her mind, making her roll her eyes subtly before she shut her out as well. Her demon let out a cold and emotionless laugh as it realised she was done fighting it. They were on the same side now.