Caballeros

California Dreamin' (Edited)

The first six months living in California was really hard on all of us. My abuela complained about every little thing all day every day. It took a toll on daddy so he sent abuela back to Texas. Shoot, I wish he would send me back, just not with her. I missed my home and Gordo so very much. I became sassy mouthed and got my fair share of spankings. I remember standing in the kitchen with hands on my hips and telling him that he was not the boss of me. He would say said stop talking to me like that and me being me would say why don't you make me? He would make me all right. I learned my lesson until the next time I did the same thing. I lived for the phone calls and letters to Gordo. Daddy only let me call once a month because it was so expensive. Daddy promised that we could go visit in the summer. One day when I was getting ready to call Gordo daddy grabbed the phone out of my hand.

"Mijta, Gordo's abuela called me and asked that you stop calling and writing him."

"But why daddy?"

"She said Gordo gets really sad after he talks to you and the sadness last for days. Let's give him some time and you'll see him in no time at all. Just one month querida."

"Can I write him and let him know we are coming?" I ask.

"Ok go ahead. You're so damn hard headed."

"I take after my daddy," I giggle. He lets out a hearty laugh.

I go into my bedroom and write a long letter to Gordo telling him that we will be going for a visit in the summer. I list all the things that I have planned for us to do. I put the letter in the mailbox the next morning. A week later while riding bikes with my neighborhood kids I see the mailman coming. I jump off my bike and run to meet him. He hands me the mail with a smile and a pat on my head. I look through the letters and see the letter I wrote to Gordo there. It says 'Return to Sender'. I run back into the house to find my daddy.

"Daddy, daddy where are you?" I shout.

"I'm in the kitchen! No grites!" Daddy says annoyed.

"How can you tell me not to scream this is important?"

"Ok, okay what is it?" he asks as I run to him.

"Daddy what does this mean?" I cried out to him. I hand him my letter.

"Oh Mi Vida, it means they sent it back to you."

"Why? Why did they do that?"

"Baby I don't know. Maybe you can ask him when we see him."

The day finally arrives for us to leave for Laredo. I couldn't sit still I was so excited. My daddy said I had ants in my pants. When we finally landed I drag daddy to the exit after getting our luggage. We see my Tio Chago and I climb into the truck quickly.

"Step on it Tio Chago!" I screech and they laugh.

The car ride seems to take forever to an impatient little girl. Once we get to the ranch I jumped out of the truck and ran down the road towards Gordo's house. I heard my daddy yell out to me but I don't have time to turn to look, I am on a mission to get to my best friend.

I ran all the way without stopping to catch my breath. I see his abuelo Lazaro sitting on the porch smoking his daily cigar. My heart is so happy to be here and to see Gordo face to face. His abuelo always had hard outward appearance it's like he was always masking his feeling.

"Hola Don Lazaro, esta Gordo?" I ask.

"Aye Mija, Gordo doesn't live here anymore." He says without any emotions at all. It's like he put up that mask as soon as he saw me. I always wondered why he was like that. Daddy says it's the Latino machismo. Whatever that is.

"Where does he live? Can you tell me so I can so see him right now?"

"Oh my love, his abuela sent him to live with his daddy's brother in Mississippi."

"What?" My lip begins to tremble. "Can I have his number so that I can talk to him?"

"No, you can't," his abuela yells from in the house.

"Please Mrs. Lorena. Please!"

"No, he got really bad after ya'll left. Go on with your daddy girl and leave us alone."

I turn to run with tears stinging my eyes. Daddy is pulling up in his old pick-up truck. I am so angry at him.

"Baby, get in the truck now." Daddy pleads with me.

"No! You knew he moved and you didn't tell me! I hate you." I scream.

"No baby, I didn't know. Tio just told me." he says. I start running away. "Juliana Maria!" he shouts. He is mad but I do not care, so am I. We are two peas in a pod my daddy and I.

I run through the thickets to the river and sit on the logs. I look across the water and I cry worse than I did when mama died.

I lost my best friend.

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