la carta de amor

cincuenta

050

I hoped to dream of you last night and I just woke up today to write this before I forget it all later.

I don't know why I was at your classroom, but I was. And I was holding a piece of paper with some formula written on it and I can clearly remember the formula I wrote. It was the formula for science. I don't even know why. But yeah, that piece of paper fell as I was going to get out of your classroom. You were going out too and I almost panicked when I saw you behind me, picking up that piece of paper.

After picking it up you gave it to me with a wide smile. I was so surprised, I'm not sure if I smiled back. But you did told me, "Messy hair, huh?"

And I got so shy, again. And then, you know dreams are too messed up always, right? It's like one scenario after the other.

So my next dream was I saw you downstairs. I don't even know what place was that, but you were with a drunk bodyguard. I wasn't sure if you were asleep on that sofa, and I'm not sure what that bodyguard stands for. But I didn't greet you, instead I went straight home. I passed by you and also hoped you would go home too, so we could go home together. But you didn't.

I can clearly remember the streets I was passing by. A street I don't know. But the feelings I felt in that dream was so real. Like I experienced it for real. Because if I would get a chance to experience it in real life, I would die just to get that chance.

Anyway, I'm happy I dreamt of you. I told myself last night to dream of you. I did. I'm happy. I'm thankful too. Thank you God, for letting me see him and interact with him even just in my dreams. Really.

17:32

I thought I wouldn't add more entry in here but I guess some things just don't go as planned.

Today, I planned to hang out with my not so close friends from school. I swear, I didn't want to hang out with them but I had no choice. I'm really thankful I saw Mikee, my very close friend from PCC, and I managed to get away with that so called hang out with them. I don't really like hanging out with people like them, people who only care about boys. I've come to realize that myself. I honestly don't really care if they get mad at me for leaving them. I wasn't feeling it. And I knew God knew what I felt. And he made a way for me to get out of that situation. I'm glad he helped me through Mikee. I'm really thankful. By the way, tomorrow's shortened classes! I'm going to PCC again. I hope to see him again.

I'm really surprised I've been writing here like I used to do before. Maybe because eventful things kept happening. I look forward to more, soon. And also, I bruised myself today. I slipped and got a bruise on my knee. A reminder of my impulsively wrong decision that I made today.

But that's all for today's entry. I'm trying so hard to not look forward for tomorrow. Ugh.

(1/17/2017)