I'm lost. Broken. And nobody knows. I help people, and when you help people, you don't get help. I couldn't look at myself think how a mess I was. It was too late for me to be fixed. Nobody could help me. I was too deep in it for being saved. I had...
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I run, I run down the stairs away from the roof, away from him. I can't love him. He will get hurt, and I don't want him to. I can't let someone in. It will crush me again.
"Lena, wait!"
I look behind me and saw Ben running behind me. I keep running without looking back again. I could hear him still running after me when I run around the corner. Why can't he understand I can't do this.
I run to the door that leads to the garden. Luckily it wasn't locked, so I open it running to the garden, hoping that he wouldn't follow me. The sky was dark, and I could feel the rain slowly falling down. How could it be sunny a minute ago, and now it's raining. It's like the weather knows how I feel.
I came to a stop when a hand grabs my wrist gently. I didn't want to look at him, so I keep my head to the side, looking down.
"Lena?" A sob escaped my mouth when he said my name. I could hear the hurt in his voice.
The rain came pouring down from the sky, but He didn't care. He just keeps holding my wrist.
"Lena, look at me." I shook my head no while tears were running down my cheek.
I didn't want to face him. It was too painful.
"Lena, please look at me." I sight closing my eyes. I turn around still with my head down. He let go of his wrist and took a step back. I looked up and saw him. He didn't look hurt. He just looked at me with a concerned looked.
"I can't," I whispered loud enough so he could hear me.
there was silence for a few seconds, and the only thing I could hear was the rain hitting the ground. " I know you're afraid to let someone in, but I'm not gone hurt you as the rest did."
He stopped for a moment before he continues.
"You can't push everyone away because the more people you push away, the more you're going to get hurt. Not from other people, but yourself." By now, we were both soaking wet.
I could feel more tears run down my face.
"I can't let you go because since you got here, I feel better, and I can think more clearly. And that's all thanks to you because you do this to me." He stepped closer, cupping my cold face with his warm hands.
"I can't please you don't understand."
I close my eyes, not taking his hands from my cheeks because I didn't want him to let me go. even though I can't love him because of Erick and my family, it felt good his hands on my cheeks. The kiss earlier, his touch, it all felt so good.
"I can't because if Erick finds out he's gone hurt you, And I don't want you to get hurt because of me." I cried out.
He wiped away the tears with his thumps.
" He's not going to hurt me, I promise, and I won't let him hurt you." I shook my head, looking down, but he makes me look back up because he still had my face in his hands.
"If we get out of here, he's gone find me and you or even Paige, and if he finds out about us, he well gets you, please I don't want you to get hurt." I sobbed.
The rain was still pouring down on us when he leans down and kisses me. He kissed me slowly, with love and passion. He was gentle but even a little rough. I laid my hand on his chest, taking a piece of his sweater in my hand pulling him closer. I didn't think of anything else than just this moment. I was living simply in this moment.
Just use two, the rain, his touch, and our lips together. This was wrong. I know what would happen if I leave here with him, but it felt so right. He pulled away, kissing me one more time, and laid his forehead on mine.
"Don't shut me out, please." He breathed out with closed eyes.
"Because I need you, and you need me." I nodded with my eyes close. "I won't shut you out. I promise," I whisper.
I open them and saw him looking at me with a smile. He pulled away and kissed my forehead.
"Come, let go inside." He took my hand, leading me inside.
I walk to my room to take some dry clothes while Ben when to his room to take his clothes. I change in them and sit on my bed, waiting for Ben. There was a knock on my door, and Ben walk in, closing the door behind him. He walks to the bed and sits down beside me.
I put the cover over us and lay my head on his chest while he wraps his arms around.
"I'm sorry," I said.
"For what ?" He asked.
I sight.
"For running away after you kiss me." He chuckles and kisses the top of my head.
"You don't have to say sorry for that." I smile and close my eyes. That night we slowly fell asleep in each other arms.
