𝐝𝐲𝐥𝐚𝐧 𝐨𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬 ✰

problems || tbs

^^^

i slouch down a little in my chair.

just like everyday, i set up the dining room with a fresh meal and sit down to wait for tom to get home. we have dinner together and just enjoy some us time. half of the year he's off doing his job, and i miss him. and this year, double booked, he's out even more. so every night he promises to be home by dinner time so we can spend a little time together. but the past couple days he's been later and later. and ive been good about it, said nothing to him, sincerely excepting all the apologizes he gives me showing up an hour later than normal, then an hour and a half. then today, an hour and a half again.

he rushes in the door, throws his bag down.

"im so sorry, y/n. work is so stressful right now and by the time i got out i realized i lost track of time and i had to-" he suddenly stops. he was speaking a mile an minute, but i didnt have a lot of energy to listen. i had a rough day at work and was mentally exhausted. i struggled to keep my eyes open.

"y/n? are you okay?" i glance up at him, sorrow fills his eyes.

"um, yeah," i sit up, holding back the tears ive been fighting all week, "yeah, i'm good, sit down." i fake a smile. he slowly walks over and sit down in his chair. he looks down.

"look, i know this sucks, im really trying. y/n, this job is important but you're more important. please dont forget that." i look up at him, his eyes show true sadness, but i somehow have the urge to not take it. if he feels that bad, why not do something about it? and if im so important, why dont i feel that way?

"its just... i dont believe you. i dont feel important. how do i feel that way if you never ask your director for time off, or ask to go home a little earlier some days or..." i stop, finally losing energy.

i dig my head in my hands, letting some tears fall onto the napkin below me.

"y/n, dont you think im trying?" a little spark of anger creeps into his voice, just a tiny bit, but i pick it up.

"i just... dont feel important anymore." i start to get up. all i want right now is to go to bed, and rest my head which is now aching as tears start to roll down my cheeks.

"y/n, wait," i look at tom, "please sit."

"i dont know tom." i stand, "i think i just need some time." i finally look at him again, and he looks as heart broken as i.

"okay." he says, looks at the ground shamefully, "ill give you the night. but i just want you to know, my job... im working on it. okay, i promise. and i hope somewhere in there, you can find a way to forgive me. i promise ill fix this." soon tears form in his eyes too, and i know he's sorry. i know he cares.

"okay." i say, before heading to my room.

i rest my head on a pillow, squeeze all my tears out, and i quickly find sleep.

---

in the morning a slight dip in the bed and a hand on my shoulder wakes me up.

before i even open my eyes i remember last night, i remember how tired i was, mentally, but also tired of the nights where i'd have to wait for tom to get home, trying not to fall asleep on the table. i knew that'd make him feel bad.

i remember the tom i used to know who'd bring me flowers and take me out on candle-lit dates, and how he used to be different. i remember supporting him through his difficult times during the beginning of his career. till it got to this point. the point it got too far.

"y/n? can we talk." i could hear the slightest rumble in his sweet, british voice. he mustve been crying.

I open my eyes.

"please."

i sit up, rub my eyes.

"look tom, i dont know whats going-"

"y/n, please. this all started because of me, can i end it?" he looked into my eyes, and i nodded. i did have a whole speech, a whole book of my thoughts through out the week so far, but i decided to save it.

"okay. i know this is awkward. this is weird for me because ive never been through this with anyone before. y/n, you are the first person ive loved and i hope youre my one and only. weve been through so much together and youve been through more. with me starting this whole acting thing its been hard for you, i know. please dont take it personal. you mean so much to me, and all i want to do is make you feel special, and i know ive been slacking the past few days. to be honest ive been wrapped up in my own head, and ive lost sight of whats really important. i love you, y/n. and i just made a big deal about it with my boss, i'm going to start getting more time off, to spend time with you and only you, y/n. i love you and all i want to do is be around you, and i hope you feel the same. i know this is probably an odd speech and i know you probably need more time, but to be honest, i dont know how long i can wait. you are mine and im so proud to say it. i cant go a day without you, i think id lose my mind but-" he finally stops, "y/n, i need you. i dont know if i can wait any longer, all night i was up trying to figure out what to say and what to do and how to do it and for the last 12 hours i almost couldnt do it, i cant live a day knowing i lost you because of some stupid job, or something i missed or over read. please y/n, please forgive me. i know this speech was kinda everywhere all at once and im sorry its not perfect but," he takes my hand, "i love you and im sorry."

i look up at him. his brown eyes meet mine.

i lose everything i had planned to say, every word every thought got lost in my mind. it all happened way to fast, but its all okay. tears started to form as i went over everything i just heard. he thought of me, and he worked for me. he knew what i wanted and he took the action needed to make me happy, and i couldnt be happier right now.

"well you didnt leave anything for me to say." i joked and slightly smiled as more tears rolled down my cheeks, tom slightly laughed. he raised his thumbs to wipe the tears away.

"i love you, y/n." he said.

"i love you too."

***