I Just Want You

Chapter 36: Can I risk Another Goodbye?

Chapter 36: Can I risk Another Goodbye?

Songs:

The Last Time by Taylor Swift

....

Melody's POV:

He turned the lock, and I walked through the door with him. The air was cold; the strange thing was that it still felt like home somehow. Even after all of these months; but I can't think like that. I came here to talk to him and I was going to bring up the idea of divorce.. Which i still wasn't totally sure about to be honest...

He scratched his head and looked at me while he cleared his throat,

"Ugh.. Can I get you something to drink?"

I crossed my arms uncomfortably...

"No, thanks," I said.

"Feel free to make yourself at home. I'm going to make myself some coffee; sure you dont want any?"

I gently shake my head no, and he awkwardly leaves the room.

I looked around the living room; which was surprisingly clean and almost the way I left it. I noticed he had a bible sitting on the coffee table which seemed odd to me; considering he was never a very religious guy. 

I made my way over to the mantle by the fireplace. There was our wedding picture and some engagement photos that I had placed there. But then I noticed some other pictures I had never seen before. A few were of me, shots that were taken when I wasn't looking. One that caught my eye was a photo where I was reading a book and smiling. It was a nice photo. The other one was of Travis and me; we were laying in bed together and I was asleep snuggled close to him and he was smiling at me, I laughed at the selfie, but then a tear made it's way down my cheek. I quickly wiped it away and then heard him clear his throat... I wonder how long he had been standing there.

"So.." He hestiantly said while he sat down on the couch twiddling his fingers.

I went back to having my arms crossed.

I sighed, "Travis what do you want?"

I sound tired, and to say it truthfully I'm exhausted.

"You know the answer to that question Mel."

"Don't you think you're a little late? I waited for four months for you to say something anything and now here we are another six months has passed... It's almost been a year."

"I know but.. Better late than never right?" I shake my head at his attempt at making a joke.

"Words don't really mean much, when their a little too late."

There was a long pause of silence.

"I don't really know what you want me to say..."

" I don't want you to say anything Travis.. I want you to let me go." I start getting irritated.

He stands up angrily.

"You know I can't do that!" He yells.

Before I know it I'm crying.. I think they are tears of anger. 

"Why didn't you say that six months ago?!?!"

He looks at me, puzzled.

"I didn't know how to say it half a year ago."

I groan in frustration.

"I waited for so long; I cried myself to sleep for months. I loved you with everything I had; and now that it's all gone you want it back... I don't have anything left Travis." I say, defeated.

"I'm sorry Mel, I'm so so so sorry. I would change it all if I could; but I can't. Don't you understand?"

"You're asking me if I understand?!?! Travis I stayed with you for months out of understanding; I have never been so unhappy in my life; but guess what!? I have no sympathy left, it's all run  out."

"I don't want your sympathy, I want your forgiveness, I want you back, I miss everything we were.. No everything we are. I miss you"

"That doesn't change anything Travis."

"Yes it does, it has to," He said and then started to cry.

I felt my heart split in two, and a lump form in the back of my throat.

I was still crying and we just stood there looking at eachother.

"I think we need to consider divorce."

His eyes were fueled with anger and before I knew it he was across the room holding my shoulders and looking into my eyes.

"No.. you.. can't.. we.. no," he cried.

I wiggled myself free of his grasp.

"Give my one good reason why I should reconsider, " I yelled.

"Because I love you!" He boomed back.

"Sometimes that isn't enough Travis!"

"It was always enough before."

He had stopped crying and was nearing closer to me.

"It was always enough for you and me. It was just us against the world. No matter how many times we screwed up we always made it back to each other. That means something to you Mel, I know it does; becaus if it didn't you would have sent the papers in the mail and not bothered to talk to me." 

I shook my head, with tears streaming down my face while he stood right before my eyes.

He cupped my face in his hands.

"It's just you and me, that's all it has to be."

"I can't do this."

"Yes you can, I know you can," He said gently.

"What do you want?" I whispered.

"I just want you."

"This is a bad idea.."

And that was the last thing I said before our lips crashed together.

***End of Chapter 36***

AUTHOR's NOTE:

sorry it took me so long to update, I havent' had a lot of motivation to write lately.. Anyways I hope you enjoyed it!

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