Disillusionment - Matthew Daddario

T h i r t y N i n e

"Alright Matt, you need to tell us what you did," Doms voice suddenly called out, turning I saw he was stood inside my trailer, Kat, Alberto and Harry beside him.

I'd been so busy reminiscing through old photos I had with her, I didn't even hear them come through the door.

"What do you mean what I did?" I arched an eyebrow, puzzled as to what they were talking about.

"What you did to Ivy," Harry sighed, nodding his head towards the framed photo I held in my hands, of us both, "That's you two right?"

I exhaled slowly, my breath seemingly impossible to find as I switched gaze back to what was one of my favourite photos, "Yeah that's me with Ivy, about a year ago actually,"

"You look happy," Dom added gently, sitting on the couch opposite me.

"We were," I nodded, biting my lip as I admired her. The smile that reached her eyes that twinkled with hope and happiness, things that were visible for everyone to see.

"These letters are affecting you man, I've only seen one of them and it hurt me to read what she wrote and to see what it did to you," Doms eyes were laced with sympathy as he spoke and all I could do was nod.

"It's nothing short of what I deserve though," I sighed sadly, placing the photo down. My eyes never leaving the picture.

"So what happened Matt? What changed?" Kat spoke softly, as through I were fragile glass, "How did something that was clearly so perfect, end with her as broken as she obviously is?"

The silence was deafening as I struggled to find the words to tell them, that I fucked up and broke one of the only people I'd ever loved. Words that would lessen the blow, so these friends wouldn't think too little of me once they knew that I broke Ivy's heart, "I left her alone at home and flew a million miles away, then I betrayed her in the worst way possible and I didn't have the balls to tell her myself,"

It was so quiet you would of heard a pin drop as I waited for any of them to respond, "Betrayed her how?" Harry whispered, the silence was deafening.

"I fell in love with someone else,"