Leaving

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The months in which Five Seconds of Summer practised flew by. Before any of us realised it, the band was leaving to go on tour. 
While I'd rarely seen Luke in the past months, we had to say goodbye already. And I was far from ready for that, and I could see that Luke wasn't ready to go too. Whether it had to do with nerves, or if it had to do with me, I didn't know.
Everything went by so fast and we hadn't had a proper chance to work on our relationship. While I had been there for him - I had to make him calm down more than once after practise - it didn't feel like we had grown closer over the past months. We barely had time together. Luke, Michael and Ashton often had to miss classes due to practise, so we didn't see each other at school either. 
Earlier this year that would've been prefferable, but now not so much. 

Now the four boys stood in front of the door with their suitcases next to them. Michael was the first one to give me a hug.
"Stay strong, I'll see you in a few weeks. Time will fly by. Before you know it we'll be back."
I highly doubted the 'time will fly' part, but I smiled anyway.
Then Ashton and Calum hugged me and after that it was time to say goodbye to my boyfriend. 
I felt him breathe against my neck and I tried to hold back the tears that were threathening to flow. I was going to miss him so much...
My boyfriend looked me in the eye and said,
"I love you and I won't forget about you, okay? I know you have some doubts about that," he was right, we had talked about that a lot, "But I'll miss you so much. I'll be back soon and then I'll give you all the attention you deserve, okay? We're both strong eno ugh to survive this. When I'm back we'll spend so much time together that you can't stand me anymore."

Tears now spilled down my cheeks, but they weren't just sad tears anymore. Of course I was immensely proud of him and I really, really hoped he would enjoy this. 
We gave each other one last hug and one last kiss before it was really time for the guys to get into the taxi. 
I waved until they were out of sight and then walked home. 
Not even sitting down on the couch, my phone buzzed with a text from Luke.  
Already missing you :(
, it said.
I sent him a text back and lay down on the couch. Staring at the ceiling I felt a little empty inside already, and thought about what Michael had said to me. His words had stuck with me; Luke loved me and would do anything to make this work. 
But I still didn't trust him completely because I knew how he had been before we met. 

And since my confidence wasn't mile high, it was hard for me to believe that Luke would be faithful to me and miss me as much as I would miss him. 
I did my best to believe it though, because I really wanted to make this work. 

And I had to put all my strength into believing it. 


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