Dare to Fall

Chapter XXXIII

*** Before ***

I've never felt so lonely. Last night, I cried until I couldn't anymore, and the tears soaked my pillow until I fell asleep. When I finally awoke, the realization hit me like a punch to the gut: I can't imagine ever being happy again with my family.

Maybe this is the end for us—a devastating, horrific conclusion to a life I never thought would spiral this way. Growing up, I never pictured my life would turn out like this, never imagined living through someone else's nightmare. Yet here I am, standing in an empty room, in an empty house, haunted by the absence of my parents. Their support felt so constant back then, even when I was just a five-year-old "homewrecker," caught between their arguments and their attempts to make it work.

I can't go back to being that carefree kid, the one who smiled through everything—who laughed as boys bullied her for her crooked smile and the way she devoured her ice cream, not caring how silly she looked. I remember those days, especially at five years old when my family was whole. We used to go on vacations together, waiting for my parents to come home, holding hands, and welcoming them with open arms as they walked through the door.

Now, my life feels more bleak than I ever thought possible. The sadness is suffocating, worse than waiting at a restaurant for food that never arrives. There's nothing worse than seeing the waiter walk past your table with a smile, only to realize that your meal isn't coming. It's devastating.

But I won't let this depression swallow me whole. I need to get out of my room, to confront what happened, and muster the strength I thought I had lost. I have to face the truth, even if it stings. Because the truth hurts, and we have to accept it to live authentically rather than wallow in a haze of lies.

I threw off the covers, refusing to look in the mirror. I knew I'd see a ghost of my former self—a mess I didn't want to face. So, I stumbled downstairs, feeling the weight of the sorrow hanging over me. The house felt lifeless, as if it mourned too, echoing the emptiness inside me. I trudged toward the kitchen, hoping to grab something to eat.

"Surprise!" My mom's voice broke through my thoughts like sunlight on a cloudy day. Confetti rained down around me, a burst of color that contrasted sharply with my mood.

"Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear Hailey, happy birthday to you!" My mom sang, her voice warm and comforting, almost angelic.

"Make a wish, honey." She held up a chocolate cake with lit candles. I stared at the flickering flames, and for a moment, a smile fought its way through my sadness. I closed my eyes, wishing for something beyond my grasp—a wish that might never come true. But for now, I focused on my mom's efforts, the way she had done this all on her own, even while knowing the turmoil we were facing.

I blew out the candles, and my mom set the cake down, her arms open wide for a hug. I melted into her embrace, feeling warmth seep through my heart, if only for a moment.

"I know your birthday was yesterday, and I know it's hard with your dad leaving again, but there's a reason for everything. He's working to provide for us. He loves you," she said, her voice steady but laced with sadness.

"I know, Mom, but it's just hard," I replied, the words tumbling out more honest than I intended. "I'm not sure I can just forgive him."

She tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and smiled gently. "You're strong. I raised you to be that way. Deep down, you still love him, and that's okay."

Her words lingered as she grabbed her keys and headed for the door. "I have to go; the hospital's been calling. Don't worry, I'll order pizza for dinner, and you can invite your friends, okay?" She kissed my forehead, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

"Don't miss the bus! It leaves at 6:30!" she called as she stepped out, her voice trailing off. I let out a heavy sigh, then trudged back upstairs to shower and get ready for school.

I pulled on a T-shirt that read "I Love Pizza," paired with black leggings. I didn't care much about fashion; I was thirteen and knew my crush wouldn't even notice me. Why waste a good outfit on a day that felt doomed?

After slipping into my favorite denim jacket against the morning chill, I rushed downstairs, craving a slice of cake. I grabbed a knife, sliced into the chocolate cake, and took a big bite. It tasted even better than I expected, despite the icing looking like a hot mess and my name spelled "Haulee" instead of "Hailey."

Yep, definitely store-bought.

Once I finished breakfast, or rather dessert, I stepped outside to wait for the school bus. Riding the bus at this age was the worst. It felt more like a rolling battleground than a mode of transport.

The front seats were taken by the popular kids—the ones who looked like they just stepped out of a magazine—while I sat at the back, the "loner's spot." I was used to it, but the isolation stung a little deeper today.

Once we arrived at school, I headed to my locker to grab my books. The bell rang, and we shuffled into our classrooms. I slipped into my Literature class, my favorite. Ms. Hildegard greeted us with her usual bright smile.

"Good morning, class!" she chimed, winking at me. I couldn't help but smile back. "Please take your seats."

"Alright, so you guys know about the field trip to Enchanted Park tomorrow, right?" she asked, glancing around.

Bea, the girl with the 4.0 GPA, raised her hand. "Aren't we supposed to bring our moms too?"

Ms. Hildegard shook her head. "No, it's a father-daughter or father-son trip. But don't worry; there'll be another event for mother-daughter bonding."

The class buzzed with excitement, and I felt my heart sink. I knew I wouldn't be going—not this year or any other. My dad's absence loomed large, a constant reminder of what I didn't have.

"Guess Hailey won't be joining us again this year because her dad's not here," Jack chimed in, his voice dripping with mockery.

"Children, please stop," Ms. Hildegard interjected firmly just as her phone rang. She excused herself to take the call, and the chatter picked up again.

"Aww, too bad the lonely girl won't be able to join us," Mia sneered. "Maybe you can just clean the school instead, Hailey. You'd fit right in."

Laughter erupted around me, and I felt the heat rise to my cheeks. "You're already ugly, and now you're a loner too," Ella chimed in, joining Mia and Emily in their cruel taunts.

I wanted to disappear, to vanish behind my desk.

"Maybe her dad's cheating on her mom, which is why he never shows up," Emily suggested, her voice dripping with false sweetness.

"Emily, Ella, and Mia, go to the principal's office, now," Ms. Hildegard called from the doorway, her voice sharp.

The trio paled, clearly shocked. Ms. Hildegard had never sent anyone to the principal before. They scuttled out, leaving the classroom in a hush.

"Hailey, don't let them get to you," Ms. Hildegard said when she returned. She walked over to pat my back, her touch both comforting and irritating. "Their words can't hurt you unless you let them. Remember, action speaks louder than words."

With that, the bell rang, signaling the end of class. I gathered my things, my heart still racing. As I stepped into the hallway, I couldn't shake the weight of their words. It felt as if they stuck to me like a bad smell, lingering and suffocating.

Today wasn't my day, not by a long shot.

***

Hello once again and finally I finished taking my exams. God damn, it's a good thing I survived.

Here is the newest update of the story, hope you still guys are reading and please don't be a ghost reader. Leave a vote, a comment about today's update and share this story to your friends!

As always, Carry on and Happy Reading!~

-The Author