Reinvent Love

This hell I call home

There comes a time when the skies turn grey and the leaves are replaced by crows on the trees. I watch this all unfold as I walk through the field in attempt to get away for a little while from my father. I thought to myself, wow, I probably look like a stock image right now. The grass had already turned a light shade of brownish yellow. The sky was grey like my sweater, and the huge pine trees surrounded me. My brown hair up in a messy bun and my "Harry Potter" glasses were slightly crooked on my face. Freckles dotted my cheeks like someone took a sharpie to me. I once was told they were "god's kisses", which I found funny being the atheist I am. I found a nice spot on the ground and laid down admiring the landscape.I need to get out of here, I can't keep living like this. I thought. As I lay, I slowly drifted off to sleep, the red leafed tree to my right, ever present and always there, tempting me every day.

    I dreamt about college, the place I was going very soon. In my dream my roommate was a lizard enthusiast with 14 pet lizards all around the apartment. Then there was a slide that all the lizards would go down to get fed near a pool that was magically in our bathroom. Every day more and more lizards would come and this went on for at least three days.

"Ruby, get up", I heard as I woke up with a jolt. It was that man I have to call my father hovering over me. I stumbled to my feet and brushed off any dirt that was stuck to me. sycamore seeds persistently stayed on my sweater. 

"What are you doing here?", he asked me.

"I-I was just walking and then I laid down and I guess I fell asleep", I stuttered out.

"Wow you go outside?", he said sarcastically.

"Yes, yes I do" I answered.

    We walked back, me keeping up a slightly quicker pace to avoid being in unison.

"What do you not want to walk with me?", He said as he noticed what I was doing. Now if I were to answer truthfully, I would of been like, heck no, why would I walk with the man who verbally abuses me with mendacious comments and hypocritical words every day? But of course I just had to lie and say I just walk quicker than him. We got back to the house and I went quickly up to my room. I opened my laptop and started to watch youtube. I'd say the internet is kind of a way to escape reality. I can stay in that universe for hours, living vicariously through two men we call Dan and Phil!

    I got hungry so I decided to make a trip downstairs. There a lot of steps and precautions I take to avoid any human contact. Every single time I just go down without caring  I end up having to conversate about stupid things that aren't worth while, my father usually ends up insulting me somehow too. First I listened to hear if my dad was down there. He's the only other person in the house so any noise would be him. I didn't hear anything, so I went down quietly. Silence is the key to being unnoticed. I would say I'm a master at it by this point. I wince when they creak, as I walk innocently down the stairs. In the blink of an eye, I ran to the pantry and grabbed some item of food, which when i got upstairs I would figure out to be a bag of chips, then I bolted back up stairs to eat it. I wasn't supposed to eat in my room but I did it anyways. My father doesn't care enough to actually check if I'm following the rules.

    After a while I got bored of the internet I picked up my ukulele and started to strum a few notes. My dad must of heard me playing, because he walked in my room forgetting to knock, sat himself down, and said, "Play me a song." I sighed and started to play the only song that he knew out of the ones I play.

" But I, can't help, falling in love, with you ", I sang, not really focusing on the words. I was more concentrated on hitting the right chords. F, G, Am, F, C, G7, C, I thought as I sang. When I was done, he clapped.

"That was so great Ruby", He told me. It was like the compliment just bounced off of me. I didn't feel anything. I was just annoyed that I always have to perform songs for him. It's like I'm his ballerina in a jewelry box spinning for him any time he wants. I didn't learn ukulele for him, I did it for me.

    Eventually I drifted off to sleep having nervous dreams about everything college will be. Luckily no lizards this time. I woke up the next morning at around 7:30. Today was the day I had to pack. I went downstairs and made myself a cup of coffee and grabbed a doughnut. Knowing myself I drank the coffee in the living room because I always forget to bring cups down from my room and I would get caught. At least I was allowed to eat in there. I enjoyed my breakfast and then I went back upstairs. I went to the attic to get my suitcase.

while I was up there I got distracted by a bunch of old stuff from my childhood. I stumbled across a picture of my mom. Memories soon flooded my head of the times we were together. The scent of cinnamon she always had, her beautiful grey eyes, I missed her so much. She died from a herion overdose when I was eight. I never understood how someone so amazing and nice with a good life could do that to them self. Then again during the last year of her life you could tell she was going down hill. At the time I had no idea what drugs were, so I was told it was a car crash. Worst lie anyones ever told me. I remember crying at her funeral so so much. No one was there for me anymore. Over time I became depressed and that was most likely one of the main reasons. My Dad fell in to a depressive state too and never was the same. I remembered I was supposed to be getting my suitcase as a tear fell from my eye.

I grabbed the suitcase and started to pack everything I could fit. I knew I'd probably have to take two. The first suitcase was stuffed with shirts, bras,underwear, and a few toiletries. I went up and got a second bag and filled that with pants, shorts, and anything else I thought I'd need. I also grabbed my ukulele, earbuds, and a few decor items just to spice up the apartment I was going to be sharing with my roomate.

New fears of weird or bad roomates filled my head as I thought of every possibility.

Two more days, I thought to myself, Two more days until I'm out of this hell I call my home.

*A/N : I'm trying to get all my chapters to over 1000 words and It's heckin hard.

Well I hope you enjoyed reading this first chapter, I'll try to have an updating schedule by the third post or something like that.

Things will start to take off soon hopefully

Keep reading! *