Emily.

All for a moment Denzel?

EMILY

Denzel

I sat in the dining room playing around with my knuckles and thinking about this man, who has put Em through so much bullshit, I wanted answers, but then there’s Emmie, I wonder how she felt, answers must be flying around in her mind about what happened to her mother, and why he lied and forged his death. I felt her presence and looked up and gave a warm smile. She sat away from me and stared.

“You’re angry. I can feel it in here.” She said shivering and looking around. I pretended to smile and laugh it off.

“Nah babe, I’m fine just you know...” I said sitting up.

“No D, no.” She shook her head knowingly.

“Em I’m fine.” She just sat there and stared down at the table and just started muttering to herself.

“Is this my life? My shit life. Oh my gosh, my whole family is mad. I bet I inherited this madness.”

“Em-”

“How can you love me? Just how? What if I get pros-natal depression? What if my children grow up mad?”

“Emily. I love you!” I said getting up and sitting next to her. She looked at me and looked distraught.

“I’m here for you, come on don’t be defeated,” She nodded tiredly and leaned on my shoulder.

“You’re still my best friend you know.” I said playing with her hair. She giggled.

“You’re still mine too, you’re my ginger delight.”

“I’m not ginger.” We both laughed and the baby monitor went off, we heard Xavier makes baby noises and sighed.

“He’s awake.”

“Give him ten minutes to cry,”

“That’s mean Denzel, that’s torture, if you know he’s awake then you give him attention.”

“Babies don’t need attention. Just foods, change their shit, and put them back to sleep.”

“You are a dead beat daddy.” She said and got up running out the room. I gasped.

“Watch when I get you!” I shouted, I heard her giggle and I smiled to myself. Well that made a difference. I completely changed her mood. Just like that.

We spent the day with Xavier and she showed me how to do certain things as “mothers know best”, and I really enjoyed it. I never spent time with her in that way where she would teach me something, it was great.

“Hold him like this Denzel, so it’s easier for him to burp.” She held him up against me and showed me, gradually he burped and we lay him in the Moses basket and sat on the couch. She started fiddling around with a pad and put it in her bra.

“What’s that?”

“So the milk doesn’t leak.”

“Right. Just feed him everything then.”

She rolled her eyes at me and adjusted her top.

“Why do you breast feed?”

“Because it creates that bond between me and my children.” I nodded slowly.

“So what can I do?”

“I suppose you can just watch if I’m honest.”

“That’s not fair. God should have made roles for dads.”