Behind A Smile

Chapter 3

Kabanata 3

Pagkatapos kong sabihin ang mga salitang iyon, nakita ko kung gaano siya nagulat. Nakita ko kung paano niya pinipilit na takpan ang totoong nararamdaman. I think she's gonna raise some questions in her mind like, how the hell did I know? Paano nga ba?

Nu'ng papasok pa lamang ako sa gate bago ako makarating sa aming silid, nakita ko siyang naglalakad na parang wala sa sarili, tulala na para bang ang lalim ng iniisip, which is very unusual dahil kapag nakikita mo siya, palagi lamang siyang seryoso, maawtoridad, at strikto. 'Yung tipong kapag siya na ang dadaan ay magpapaubaya ang kanyang mga makakasalubong.

Every students fear her. But I am not included. I came here to study, and not to fear anyone. Alam ko kung kailan ako nasa tama o mali, alam ko kung ano ang lugar ko, at alam ko kung paano rumespeto. Estudyante ako, at kailangan kong irespeto ang mga guro, ang mga nakakatanda sa akin. But their position and their state of life doesn't scare me at all. May mas nakakatakot pang mga tao na mismong ako, nakasalamuha ko na.

Habang nangyayari iyong titigan namin ni Marco, naramdaman kong may paparating na sa pinto. Ang pinto namin ay transparent sa may parteng itaas, kaya makikita mo ang mukha ng sino man na nanaising pumasok doon. Lalong-lalo na kapag nasa likod na parte ka, sa may kanang bahagi.

I craned my neck at the door, and there, I saw a woman who was weak, who was in frail, and who was in deep misery. After a few seconds, she took a deep breath and I saw how she wiped her eyes with her handkerchief and I saw how she tried to paint a smile in her face. It was like she was convincing herself to be happy, to be okay, when she is really not.

I admire her, because she is certainly good at hiding her emotions. Everyone may concluded that she is really happy, like she has no problems, and is that, she's only dealing with her usual self, but not to me. I know that this woman is in pain. The question is, what could be the reason?

"Excuse me, Miss Cortez?" She said defensively. She's trying to defend herself, seal up her emotions.

I smiled. "Forget it, miss. If you may, can I go?"

I squeezed her right hand na nasa ibabaw ng kanyang table to give her comfort. Baka nakakahalata na din ang mga kaklase ko. But it's okay though. It's just that, I don't want them to see her face. It's like I am blocking her from the eyes of my classmates. I don't want them to see our strict teacher becoming weak. I know that she wouldn't like it, either.

She should thank me anyway for doing this. I think, I'm doing her a favor here. Though, I can't help but wonder what's wrong with her. I want to know. Or... is there really need for me to?

Mukhang nagulat siya sa pagpisil ko sa kanyang kamay. It's okay. You will be okay. I looked at her at doon ko naramdaman ang ginhawa sa kanyang mga mata. Marahil ginhawa dahil alam niyang may tao pang nandiyan para sa kanya at ginhawa dahil alam niyang hindi siya nag-iisa. I smiled at her.

Para naman siyang biglang nagising mula sa mahabang pagkakatulog at agarang ibinalik ang kanyang mukha sa pagiging maawtoridad at strikto. I smirked. What a defense mechanism, huh?

Tumango na lamang siya at naglakad na ako pabalik sa aking upuan at nakita kong patayo na rin si Karina upang ipasa ang kanyang papel. I just looked at her, and she seemed confused.

"Bakit ang tagal mong nagpasa? May pinagkuwentuhan pa ba kayo ni Miss Sungit?"

I let out a small laugh because of what she just said. Hanggang ngayon? Miss Sungit pa rin ang tawag niya kay Miss Dela Vega? Umiling na lamang ako sa kanya.