Lucid Dreaming

15

"Bullshit!" Ethan got up out of the doctors bed.

"Ethan, calm down." The doctor lowered his hand sighing Ethan to chill out.

"The fuck you mean calm down? You're telling me one of us is gonna fucking die or we will both have eternal suffering?" Ethan shoved one of the stools onto the ground, pacing back and forth.

"I'm sorry sir, there's no other option. Trust me I don't want to see anyone leave us either." He held onto Ethan's shoulder.

Ethan pushed his hand off of him aggressively and swung open the door, walking out fast.

I let out a huge huff of stress filled air and looked to my mom who hand her hands over her mouth. "I'll go talk to him."

I opened up the door and looked down the long empty hallway not seeing anyone around.

I turned to my right and walked down the curved hallway. When I reached the empty sitting area, I saw Ethan sitting in a chair with his head in his hands.

I let out a sigh, thank god I found him.

I sat down next to him putting my hand onto his warm grey long sleeve. I rubbed my hand up and down his back while he sniffed his nose. "It's okay." I comforted him.

"No." he growled aggressively standing up. He paced back and forth as I stood up. "It's not okay, Gabby. Nothing about this is okay!" His chest breathed heavily in and out as his eyebrows narrowed downwards.

"We can figure something out!" I started to yell back.

"There's no other options Gabby! I'm gonna die and you're gonna live a happy life!" He shouted into my face.

I swear I felt my heart tear into two full pieces. "No! That's not an option!" I screamed.

He leaned his elbow onto the wall as he looked down, closing his eyes. His breathing was heavy from stress. "That's the only option." His soft voice spoke.

I walked up behind him, wrapping my arms around his torso while my head rested onto his back letting him calm down.

"I'm not letting you die Gabby. I'm not letting you suffer and I'm not letting you leave your mom." His raspy voice cracked.

"Ethan-" I said with defeat in my voice. His body turned around to face me.

"I have no one to live for and nothing to live for. The only person I care about is you and if you die-" his eyes became glossy as a tear fell from his eye.

My thumb quickly wiped the warm tear off of his face, "baby."

His big hands grabbed onto mine as he held them into his chest.

"You really think I'm gonna let you die? Like let's face reality for a second. This is crazy!" I tried to laugh.

"Face the real reality, Gabby. Crazy things happen, and this is gonna happen. There's no stopping it." He admit.

I know he's right, but i need to be the one to die. Ethan deserves nothing but the world. I can't have him die for me.

I know that Ethan will stop at nothing to die first, I just need to beat him.

"Don't do anything stupid, Ethan okay?" I placed my hands onto his muscular neck.

His eyes kept looking down, avoiding eye contact.
"Hey." I lifted his head softly to look at me.

His hazel eyes slowly shifted into mine, giving me chills. "I love you okay? No matter what? But promise me that we won't go on a suicide mission." I held out my pinky.

He rubbed his lips together as his eyes drooped. His pinky latched onto mine, "I promise."

I smiled softly. His face slowly moved towards mine as both of our eyes shut.

"Gabby?" My mom interrupted.
I rolled my eyes drastically, "What!" I threw my hands into the air. This is the 4th time Ethan and I's kiss has been interrupted. Kissing him makes me feel happy and I haven't been able to do that in almost two weeks because of fucking interruptions.

"Sorry, we are allowed to leave." My mom pointed towards the exit.

Ethan and I looked at each other then interlocking hands.

____

"Goodnight." I gently moved Ethan's hair out of his face while his deep hazel eyes didn't move off of my face.

He stayed quiet for a minute, admiring me. "What?" I asked him.

He blinked a couple times then turning onto his back and looking up at the ceiling. "You're just so damn pretty."

A smile broke onto my face, yet my heart felt sad. The only weird thing is I wasn't sad, cause I know I'm the end of all of this, I'm gonna be the one to die. So why am I sad? Is Ethan sad?

I rested my arm across him, turning onto my stomach as my head rested onto his chest.

His head looked down to me, his eyes not breaking eye contact with mine. His hand moved to my jaw as his thumb gripped my cheek.

We both leaned in, closing our eyes the connecting our lips. My body immediately jolted with electricity, from head to toe. I've been waiting for this for so long, and I know he knows how amazing this feels. His lips slowly smushed into mine over and over again very slowly.

This kiss had so much passion and meaning in it. Why? I don't know, but I'm not complaining.

My lips lightly sucked his top lip while he held onto my bottom lip. Our lips fit so perfectly.

When we pulled away, he opened his eyes; they were glossy.

"What's wrong?" I ran my fingers through his wing.
"I love you." He lightly smiled at me.
"I love you too." I smiled.

I just wanted to hug him so tight and never let go. Why does life have to be like this? So unfair? Ethan's and I are both such good people. Why do bad things happen to amazing people?

I placed both of my hands onto his chest while his arm wrapped around me, and we fell asleep.

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