Seasons of Love || Richard Camacho

11

March 26th

My eyes open when I feel a strange feeling between my legs. 'HOLY FUCKING SHIT.' 'Shhht, I think my mom might be up already.' He says, his lips not leaving my labia. I lift up the duvet and look him in the eyes. 'How old were you again?' 'I'm nineteen.' He lets his tongue slip out and I let my head fall back into the pillow. 'Okay, continue.' I let my fingers tangle in his hair and I can't control my moaning. This boy has a very, very nice tongue and he lives in Amsterdam. I might need to add him to my list of regulars. After my climax the boy keeps licking and sucking down under and he doesn't stop when my phone rings. I pick up. 'Good morning.' My voice is unstable and filled with pleasure. A moan escapes my mouth when the words 'Buenos dias hermosa.' come through the phone. I sit up, so the boy between my legs is not near my vagina anymore. 'Hi.' I clear my throat and try to sound normal. 'You still want to hang out today?' I don't even think about my answer. 'Sure. When and where?' We decide to meet in front of the Blue Tea House in the Vondelpark. In an hour. So I start putting my clothes on, I want to shower before meeting Richard. I don't smell nice. 'It was nice meeting you...' I make clear that I don't know his name and he laughs. 'Nick.' 'Nice, Nick. Maybe I'll see you again. We live in a big city, but who knows.' I run down the stairs and almost bump into a woman. Nick's mother, no fucking way. 'Hi, thank you for letting me stay over. See ya.' AWKWARD. When I'm finally outside, I call Katarina. 'Kat, you are tagging along right?' 'Yes ofcourse. Isa is as well.' 'Nice.' 'See ya in a bit.'

'Hi.' Katarina and Isa are already sitting on a bench outside of the tea house. 'Hi Kat, hi Isa.' 'Could you come and sit please?' She is showing me her motherly face. Oh shit. I sit down and feel super uncomfortable. 'Did you sleep in your own bed last night?' I sigh and look at the ground. 'Why are you doing this? Why do you go home with strange guys?' 'Katarina please.' 'Katarina nothing, where is your self-respect? You know this is not normal, right?' And those words hurt. And the fact that Kat is saying these things to me, hurts even more. A tear runs down my cheek. 'See, you know it's not okay. You are pretending to love your slutty lifestyle, but you don't.' I get up and walk away from the bench. Why the fuck are they following me. I came here for a nice afternoon with friends, but this is no fun at all. 'Leave me alone.' I mumble. When I'm at the exit of the park, Richard and the other boys are just getting out of a taxi. 'Summer!' Richard waves at me from a distance. Katarina wants to say something, but she just rolls her eyes and sighs. 'Sorry we're late. Joel had to re-do his hair 'cause Zabdi ruined it.' I try to wipe my tears in a subtle way, but I fail. 'Hey, what's wrong?' Richard grabs my hands and kisses the back of them. 'Katarina is being a bitch and I can't fucking handle that right now.' 'I am not being a bitch. I am being honest.' 'Why don't we go to the tea house and talk about it, yeah?' 'No, I don't want you guys to judge me as well. Just let me go home.' 'Oh please, he saw you with that boy yesterday. So he already knows.' Richard's face seems to say that he's sorry. This is so embarrassing.