Seasons of Love || Richard Camacho

19

April 17th

'I just want to fuck someone.' I whine. 'You are a strong lady, you can do this shit. Can't you just... You know...' Katarina puts her pointer finger and her middle finger together and moves them together, keeping a rhythm. Isa and I laugh. They know that I am having a hard time, so they visit me often. And Richard and I haven't stopped facetiming. When I tell the girls how nice he is, they start joking about me being in love again. 'I was thinking... I kinda forget the fact that the guys are famous all the time.' Isa seems to be blushing.  'Same.' 'Same, have you checked them out on youtube? Not just the music videos. All the videos?' Turns out, none of us has, so we decide it's time to stalk our "crushes". Well, that's what Isa calls them. I don't have a crush on Richard. Just making that clear. 

'LOOK HOW CUTE ERICK WAS!' 'CHRIS HIS HAIR OH MY GOD.' 'What the...' Kat and Isa stop their own research and look at my laptop. 'Maybe it's his younger sister? Or a cousin? Maybe it's a friend's.' After some frantic google sessions, it's clear to me that it's not his younger sister, not a cousin and not from a friend. 'He could've told me. It's not like a small thing, right?' I look at my girls and they shake their heads. 'She's really cute though.' 'Well, yeah Isa she is, but that doesn't change a damn thing. I need to talk to him.' I grab my phone from the table and call Richard on facetime. 'Hola Summer!' Joel's face fills the screen. I see Kat rolling her eyes. I sign her to shut up. 'Oh shit. Are you okay? You seem angry.' 'I need to speak to Richard.' 'Hey, she said my real name.' Richard grabs the phone from Joel and his face change from surprised to concerned when he sees my face. 'What's wrong?' 'You say that if I want you to help me, I need to be honest and tell you when I sleep with a random guy. But you forgot to tell me you had your own taste of one-night stands as well.' He looks confused. 'It's not about having one-night stands, Summer. It's about respect for yourself and you know, a few one-night stands is not the same as a one-night stand every evening. Sorry if I offend you by saying that.' 'I know I'm a slut and I know what I used to do was not right. But at least I had the guts to explain myself instead of keeping it a secret from you.' I say, ignoring the fact it wasn't me who told him. 'What are you talking about?' I show him the screen of my laptop. 'Not a minor detail, is it? I guess she should be like important to you or something. But you haven't told me, so either she's not important or our friendship means nothing to you.' 'Okay wait a second.' Kat grabs my phone and ends the call. 'No need to be this hard on him. You haven't told him everything either. And you should give him the chance to defend himself. Please don't say anything you'll regret. He is important to you. And if he didn't care, he wouldn't call you every fucking day.' I want to protest, but I know what she's talking about. I haven't told him everything. And when Katarina says bad words, she means it. I sigh. 'Okay.' I take my phone from her and call Richard again. 'I am sorry. I shouldn't have reacted like that.' 'It's okay. I understand that it's a bit much. I should've told you. But honestly, I thought you already knew, after telling you I am kinda famous. I expected you to google us immediately.' I hear Christopher laughing in the background. 'Oh I am famous. You should google me. If you don't, you're stupid.' I laugh and I see Richard throwing a pillow at Chris. Isa starts moving her hands as if she is a bird. 'No Isa, go facetime him yourself.' And so she does. And Katarina calls Erick. Richard gets out of the room and lies down on what I think is a bed. He starts telling me about Aaliyah. About how girls have rejected him because of her and about her mother. After an hour, I tell him that we're okay. 'But why would you care about me rejecting you? We're friends, right?' He opens his mouth several times, but there's no sound. 'It's okay, Richmond.' I wink at the screen and I can see him struggling, not knowing how to make this a little bit less awkward for himself. 'I'm gonna check on my girls, yeah. I'll call you tomorrow.' Well, that was a bit awkward. Maybe I shouldn't have called him. But in my defense, he didn't fucking tell me he has a daughter. A CHILD. He has a CHILD. Not that there's anything wrong with that. But I don't know if I could take care of a child. Not that I'm in that position. It's not like I want to start dating Richard. Hah. Nah, I don't like him like that. Honestly. So. No problem.