12.05.17
Tonight I'm holding on to this blade real tight, I shut my eyes as I cling unto it anticipating it to cut through my skin but nothing happens. Instead I was crying, crying non stop saying sorry to myself I haven't done this since the last time and now I'm too afraid, Afraid I the pain I've been going through won't subside and afraid that I was close to harming my self again. I put back the blade on its case but I still cling to it while tears wont stop from falling, I am tired of all this fucked up mess that I am in the only escape I knew was not helping me anymore because I can't do it any longer I've become too weak to even cut.
