Before They Were Stars {COMPLETED}

Chapter Thirty: In a Bind

Chapter Thirty: In A Bind

I woke up the next morning confused I had a dream that felt more real than any other dream I’ve ever had. I mean it just had to be a dream no way could I actually be pregnant.

As soon as I looked over to my nightstand I knew it wasn’t a dream because there sat my ultrasound of the being inside me, my baby. I felt the tears start drifting down my face as I stared at the picture.

Being told that I could never have a baby due to the way I lost my baby girl, I never even knew about, had been really hard on me and now here I am proving them all wrong but at what cost?

Who was I going to lose once the baby arrived? I knew deep down that my secrets would come out in the open once I asked even just one of the three guys to take a DNA test to either verify or deny him as the father.

Was I up to going through all of that? Could I handle losing even one, if not all of them? I knew from this moment on I had to plan every action I took ensuring in the end the hurt wouldn’t be unbearable.

I had hopes of them all being understanding and at least sticking around as my friend but I knew that was going to be really hard knowing that I had a child with one of the others and it all happened while I was going back and forth between the three of them.

What kind of person am I? How could I be so cruel to not think of any of their feelings? In reality I knew the answers, I was selfish, I enjoyed the attention, and being desired by all of them.

As sad as it was I truly did love each of them. I decided from this moment on I would be doing what was best for my baby no matter what the cost. I began forming a plan to set into motion as soon as I made all the arrangements.

My goal was to get everything in order so that none of them would see me once I started showing saving me from all their questions. I knew this was best for me and the baby no matter how much it was going to hurt me to stay away from the ones I loved.

I filled the girls in on my plans and as much as they hated having to lie to their boyfriends along with not being able to see me all the time they agreed to go along with my wishes.

Once they were on board things started to fall into place. We decided to plan a trip to surprise the guys while they were in London. Once my doctor gave me the green light to travel we booked our flights.

The girls were nervous about my flying even though the doctor said it was okay for me to go. They were driving me crazy the entire flight. “How are you feeling Jay?” Roxy asked for the millionth time.

“Rox, I’m fine just as I was ten minutes ago.” I sighed. “I’m sorry I know I’m annoying you but I’m just worried about you I know this trip is going to be hard on you especially with what you have come to do.” She smiled.

“I know you are just looking out for me but this just has to be done and you’re right it is going to be really hard but it’s for the best.” I smiled lying back in my seat.

I pretty much slept through the rest of the flight. Once we landed we took a taxi to the hotel where we knew the guys would be staying. We had booked our rooms under our fake identities that coincided with the guys fake names.

Roxy had talked to the concierge and explained who we were and that we were there to surprise the guys for their last show before their week long break.

The closer it got for us to see them the more nervous I became. I couldn’t tell if my upset stomach was my nerves or morning sickness. I chalked it up to being a mixture of both. I couldn’t wait to see Nick but having to keep such a big secret from him and the others was weighing on me.