Newt imagines 2

They chose the new girl, not me

Small forewarning it's bad and long.... Because I've become extremely unmotivated and lazy 😂.

It was slightly taller than any man to have ever existed, but it looked old, deep wrinkles set in its yellow skin from the stitches.

Meanwhile the skinned crank carcasses hung in the other room, stinking of rot and maggots after only one day.

My monster was defaced with an lump of metal as a brain, no emotions in a single bolt of it. I stand back admiring my work, it was certainly scary and vicious, but it couldn't be killed by immunes or the infected, it was purely a robot with skin. "I want blades as finger and toe nails, and some stuck out it's shoulders."
Ava smiled behind me. "You're truly becoming one of us." I could tell she too liked my work, and that made me love my monster. I had pleased Ava, the only woman that seemed to have status in this crumbling world. "You'll be going to paradise before you know it." Her smile was gone, and I felt uneasy, like I did a lot recently. Nothing seemed quite right in this place. Not anymore.
I shake my head. "Not yet, my monster needs to be killable and I need to get the boys back." I watch the engineers insert the blades into the squidgy flesh, no muscle underneath the skin to support any stiffness it in.
"Not Teresa?" Ava laughed humoured by my hatred for the not quite so much 'new girl' she must have been with the gladers on the run for.... 2 weeks, 5 days and 18 hours, so technically her 'greenie' name should be fading out by now.
That's 2weeks, 5 days and 18 hours I've lost with Newt. I've spent tortured by the unknowing of why I was left behind. The continuous panic in my mind that it was my fault. Had I made a move on Newt? Did he not share these deep emotions?

***
I sit at breakfast, Leo and Coper opposite me, our new friendship was based upon silence. They refused to look at each other, their bodies angled opposite ways.
"How's your machine coming along?" Leo asked picking away at his food, even frypan could cook better than this, he made the best bacon ever. They don't have bacon here, let alone pigs.
I look up from my day dream. "Hmmm? Oh it's alright, I'm a little stuck...."
"Fuck it, why not tell me?" Coper said between huge mouthfuls of mash.
I paused and shook my head not wanting to go down that road. We feel into silence the only sound was Coper's fork scratching alone the china plate. I wanted to break his neck for it. But I stayed silent.
"Will you stop that? Just cause it worked on mittens doesn't mean it's gonna work on her." Leo snapped at Coper. Tensions were running high, both the boys were angry, almost everyone had vanished odd to paradise, all apart for them and a couple of newbies. Of course, their logic was to blame each other. Just why? I have no ideas.
"Who was mittens?" I ask trying to break the tension.
"Stupid fucking cat." Coper grumbled.
Leo sighed and rolled his eyes. "Mittens was our maze's cat. But she was killed by a glader within a year. Coper, here, wasn't a fan of her so he used to make these noises to scare her away and piss her off."
I chuckled remembering my own glade's pet, a black lab, fat thing, intelligently named Bark because he never barked. "Why would someone kill a cat?" I ask astonished, I can't think of a single glader who would have wanted to kill Bark, Christ, he brought the most smiles to people's faces.
Coper cut Leo off. "We'd been tryin' to kill her for fucking years, nine lives that cat had."
I nod my head as Leo began to explain why everyone hated the poor cat. Nine lives.... That certainly made something hard to kill. Would it work? If I gave my monsters lots of lives, then they are hard to kill.... Hard enough for only the immunes to do? Not a clue.

***
I was happy. Not like pure, real happiness, this was created by my heart and the numbness I recognised to be the lovely feeling of morphine. My eyes glimmered in the artificial light source above. The warmth from morphine and a heated blanket kept the pain away, making me fuzzy on the inside.
A tender, touch like felt ran down the trench of two arteries on my wrist, all the way to my elbow. I swung my head over, like it was a sack of pebbles. A face so close I hardly noticed the defined, stunning features. His own trench on his upper lip, moved in time with his lips, as he spoke soundless words. A stray piece of blond hair fell on his left eye, it split the chocolate chip in his eye in half. His hands left me and I felt a rush of something that wasn't happiness, but once the hair was in place, it was back. A single finger brushing over my arm. My chest hummed at his words that I couldn't process, I was so high. I wanted to be closer to him, so I shuffled.
Newt's hands gently pushed me back down into the bed like I was a fragile ornament, a picture to be hung on the wall, a china doll to terrify the babies. I couldn't struggle against him, the stiff ache from my abdomen burnt like a block of coal, it never went out not even after a bucket of water. "Y/n, you need to stay here." He gulped and I saw fear and upset in his eyes. I wanted to ask what was wrong, touch his cheek but I couldn't, instead I made a moan in complaint. "You can't come with me, you belong here." He gulped and I thought I saw sweat on his brow. Then his face bent over really close.