Temporary Bliss [boyxboy]

17: Softening

Caleb

(Note: this is the same day as described in the chapter before, only from Caleb's point of view.)

I got up the next morning to go to work, checking on Finn first. He slept soundly, but he didn't look too good. His forehead was covered in a light sheen of sweat and his skin was slightly off-color.

I didn't like to admit it, but I was a little concerned. I wanted to take him to a doctor, but I knew that I'd probably have to sedate him first to get him to go.

I shook him gently, but he just groaned and pulled the blanket over his head.

"I'm leaving for work now. Matt's coming over later," I explained and finally he opened his eyes a slit.

"Who the fuck is Matt?" he asked groggily and I had to smile.

"A friend. He's gonna come over every once in a while when he doesn't have class. He got kicked out of his college dorm," I said.
When I saw Finn's worried facial expression, I added: "Don't worry, he's a fag like you. You two will get along great."

He looked at me disapprovingly, "Stop saying that."

I didn't answer, and suddenly felt quite awkward standing there.

"Well, best be off," I muttered as I tucked my shirt into my pants, "I'll see you later."

So I left, softly closing Finn's bedroom door and trudging down the stairs, thinking.
What was I even doing, taking care of him like I was his mom? I mean, yeah we were friends - but still, it felt weird.

I was definitely... softening and I fucking hated it. I didn't do stuff like... Make tea and dinner for people cause they had a cold.
I figured it was Finn who was doing this to me. He had changed somehow, ever since he'd moved in with me. And he had this way of making me feel guilty without even trying.

I just had to ignore it.
Ignore it and try to reinstate the friendship we'd had since fifth grade.

Because lately, it seemed like our roles in this "relationship" were getting a little mixed up, and it was making me ridiculously uneasy.
Being overly-nice with anyone didn't sit well with me, even if it was my best friend.

I felt a little guilty about going to work while Finn was sick either way.
I mean, he was a grown man and could take care of himself, but still, I just had this urge to be there when he wasn't feeling well.
At least Matt was coming over - knowing him, he'd fuss over Finn anyway and treat him like he was a hospital patient that needed to be taken care of. I wasn't good at making people feel better anyway.

With that thought, I made my way out of the front door and to the office.

I didn't like my job, I really didn't. Yeah, a classic first world problem, huh? It paid ridiculously well, as I was basically running my parents' company now.
So, as much as I hated it, I did enjoy having my own money to spend, feeling a little less dependent on my parental unit, though I obviously still was.

Independence had always been a big deal for me. I hadn't accomplished it, but I had always wanted to. To not have to worry about anyone else, doing whatever you pleased without facing any consequences with family or friends. Maybe it was slightly unrealistic, but I could dream.

Going to meetings, going over figures and doing all sorts of other accountancy things became very boring very quickly.
I found myself spacing out at my wooden desk more and more frequently, thinking about what Finn might have been doing.

I'd actually toyed with the idea of calling him, just to see what he was up to, if he was feeling any better, quite a few times that day, but then I decided it was better to not do that.
Not only did it make me feel weird, but I also figured that Finn was probably napping on the couch or something, so I didn't want to interrupt that.