Cherishing you ♡ - Kang Daniel

×[¤ Chapter 21 ¤] ×

○ Just because I let you go, doesn't mean I wanted too ○

*Back off school*

Fays pov~

"Why did you ask me to come out to here?" I could hear a tint off surprise in Daniels voice, as he finally arrived.

He knew I would usually just text him, or go to his class if I wanted to talk about something. If I had to be honest, after the day I received his letter we never met up like this.

Yet I knew, I had to do this. It was unhealthy for him, and for me, to drag this on. May it be, that I would have to be the one to break the wall, even if I didn't want to.

"Don't you think it's time to stop this?" I said as I turned around with a lazy smile on my face. I couldn't propperly look him in the eye, so I tilted my head up, and gazed at the clear evening sky.

"What do you mean?" Daniel started laughing in a baffeld way.

"You should go give your love letter to the real one idiot." I sighed as if it was all so obvious "Wasn't it fun this little act off us?"

"So you knew?" Immediately all laughs were gone, and Daniel looked at me with a serious look.

"Why can't you even remember you wrote her name down in your love letter." I emphatised the words,"her name" and "your love letter",  just to get the message clear "Don't take me wrong, but I knew everything since the moment I opened that envelope."

"Then why?" Daniel sounded relative calm, as he took a step closer to me.

"Why I agreed to date you?" I quoted date with my fingers, as I chuckled "Because there was no name in the letter actually." 

I forced myself to go on in an amused manner, "I wanted to know if you were really fit for Risa. Would she have to go through the troubles like in middle school, or were you different? Makes me wonder, why you said yes to me tho?"

Daniel slightly narrowed his eyes, and asked me "Was falling in love allong the way, in the plan too?"

We were standing quite close, but far away. I couldn't quite read him well, and it almost felt like he was weighing things trough.

"No way it was." For one second I wanted to break down, and just yell at him. Tell him, how much I hated him, but I composed myself and forced a grin "You're not the only one who can act Daniel."

"Then did I pass your test or...?" Somehow he seemed unpleased, almost mad, but I shrugged it off as just a hopeful wish by myself.

"Perfect score." I said walking closer as I pulled the letter out off my pocket "Also don't worry, no one knows you were my "boyfriend". Since we never made it public, except to our friends. So this will be a perfectly executed plan."

Daniel didn't say anything and just kept on staring at me, with one off his hands in a fist. I couldn't fully place his expression, but maybe I didn't want to read into it, too deeply.

"Go to the dance classroom." I lowerd my voice a bit, as I pressed the letter against his chest, and walked past him "It's the perfect timing to give your letter."

"Goodbye Niel." As I left him behind and walked away, my lip started quivering again. My scraped together composure started breaking down, like a crumbling leave.

I looked down at the floor, thanking the lack off students at this side off the building, as I cursed him in my head "You two left legged, lying giant, moronic idiot!"

I quickly rushed in to a toilet and locked myself up. Tears were streaming down my face, as I covered my mouth with my hands, preventing noise coming out.

I didn't really understand why I was crying so hard again. Was it because I still had expectations remaining? That it'll go well, or was it because it was finally over? That I wouldn't feel burdened anymore by the truth or did I expect him to deny it?

I thought I had put myself passed it, that I didn't care much anymore. But it was all a facade I held up for myself. I had been lying to my own face, saying I didn't care that much about him.

I was still confused too, the day I gave him my answer he could've just explained it to me. Even if at that moment he was too dazed, why not within the next day? Why prolongue it for a month, acting like he was serious about me, and still not tell me?

"I don't understand you Kang Daniel." I slumped down on the toilet trying to calm down my breathing, so that I could go out with a composed face again 'Yet, why can't I wholeheartedly say that I hate you?"

Daniels pov~

"Why now?!!" I mentally screamed as I heard her say the words "Shouldn't we end it now?"

I felt numb and unable to comprehend what was going on. I couldn't even bring out words, or even a proper explanation.

All I could think off was, how her face looked so nonchalant whilst telling me she was testing me, and it was all a act.

My brain heard the words"there was a name in the letter" but my memory couldn't find the matching image to it. Would I really forget something so important?

"Was everything off the past month a lie?" I asked in my head, but I never spoke those words out loud "Was everything I felt for you a lie?! Am I a fool?!"

When she pushed the letter against my chest, I wanted to grab her hand pull her back, and tell her it was a lie. That she should get back to reality, that she should stay with me. I wanted to yell at her, hold her tightly, and cry at the same time.

"You're not the only actor Daniel."

Instead, I just stood there like a statue, almost as if I didn't care. It's been a solid five minutes since she left, and slowly my feet started moving. I'm a fool! That's the only thing going through my mind, and I fucked up big time.

"It's the perfect timing to give your love letter."

I wanted to know what her last words meant, I started running through corridors, ignoring the rules of no running inside the school. My feet brought me to the dance room, and with a staggering breath I slammed the door open.

Hurled up on the ground, as she hugged her knees to her chest was Risa. When she looked up shocked,  I could see that she had been crying.

Her red cheeks and puffy eyes were the remains off her feelings. Just by seeing her, my mind started to clear up, and finally, Fays words started dawning on me. That's when all the puzzle pieces started falling together.

"I..." I started as I clutched the letter in my hand...