I want to love you again. I want to want you again. But it's too far gone. I want to treat you better, in a way that's unreal. I know I'm late, and I can't undo what I've done, to drive the wedge between us even bigger than it already was before. Lately it's been a way, that I feel all kinds of feelings about. I've been happy, so happy. And I want to love you again. In fact I'm not sure if I ever really stopped. I said I want to love you, I want to want you. I already do, it's just that instead of the stinging pain I felt over the fact that I didn't want to, now I do again. It seemed like you were barely there at the time, like you didn't really exist, i only felt your presence trulyhit me when you were really gone. I'm sure you know that you have an ungodly ability to reel me back in with simple words, and phrases. You know what to say and do because you know you can get me to come back, you know that deep down I never even left. I know you know that. I know that I could find somebody else, but I don't want to. Because I'm drained, and because for some reason I haven't really given up on you yet. When it would be so, so easy to. I know you don't want that back. The way it was. I can't tell you any of this because I've let my pride go too many times to do it again, with nothing but a slight probability of it being worth it. I'm happy, I am right now. But like last night, my thoughts will be my thoughts. I'll keep them to myself.
