HeartFelt Poetry| 18+

POEM #33|Not My Master

You hurt me, not with your words
But with your eyes, staring at me
With such despise, that my body
Crinkled from the impact of the
Color of your angry eyes

You destroyed me, not with your mind
But with your hands, that use to love me
Close through the night, caring and kind
Turned dark, like night
I'm afraid of the dark now

You broke me, not my body
But my soul, leaving it a shattered mess
For somebody to pick up, piece by piece
Until they can put it back together
But it will never be the same

You made me hate, who I was
The girl I use to be, the innocence
Of my own soul laid ruin by the moments I spent being yours
Just to realize I was nothing but a pawn
In a game I couldn't win

I hated chess, too much confusion
Yet you played it with such strategy
I couldn't see the moves, that would
Ruin the very human I strived to be
Turning me into, the very person
I would kill with a gun

I looked in the mirror, who was I
You said I was yours, your beauty
Yet I was wrapped in chains
Unloving, my eyes bloodshot
Filled with tears.

You loved me right?
Then why did it hurt, when your
Fist came in contact with my skin
Forcing me to hit you in return
Because I couldn't control the
Reflex that hit me cold in the chest

Yet I was wrong, I hurt you
YOU hurt me, yet yours was justified
I was too loud, I spoke mean things
I WAS wrong, you were right
I'm sorry, please stop

Stay out of my head, stop hurting me
Stop yelling, stop screaming
Please leave me alone, get out
GET OUT, GET OUT, GET OUT

I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE
Breath in
Breath out
I'm going insane, your gone
Yet your tainted in my mind

I hear your voice, at random times
When I do something you wouldn't like
My body freezes, my mind rewinds
I think of your touch, it makes me scream
My voice goes silent, I'm all alone
You're hurting me, please stop

It's bruising, no I don't want to
I don't want to be this, I don't want to
Love like this
Hatred isn't love, I shouldn't hate to love you
I shouldn't be tainted like this

Your gone, you left, you walked
Yet you fight, you push, you crawl
Back into my brain with every shove
Trying to lay waste to the sane I have
Created with SOMEBODY else

Who showed me what LOVE
Actually was and your wrong
You didn't love me, you wanted me
You wanted me to stay yours
You wanted to control me

WE wanted control, we didn't
WANT LOVE and we didn't realize.
You darkened my soul, you changed
My mind and made me something
I loathed, to the point I almost killed her

I almost killed me, with a knife
With pills in a bottle, and a can of alchole
Hoping it could take away the life
You had created in such short time

The monster was inside me
You polluted me, I couldn't breath
Yet I fought my way out
I TOOK in fresh air, and I lived

Now I'm happy, yet your still there
In the back of my mind
Trying to ruin my life
But I will keep you caged, you lie
I can be free, I can be me
I will not be your puppet

Cause you are not my master.

Written By: Teha Brown aka WILTEDROSE213

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Sincerely, your writer

Wiltedrose213 ❤️