Kenny Is Not Okay

Empty, short and dull

There he was again- sitting in that brown leather armchair opposite his therapist. Another session of useless questions that might have helped him if he put any effort into bonding with his therapist. But no, even after all this time the answers had to be pretty much squeezed out of him like the last bits of toothpaste out of the tube.

"So, how has the past week been? The ward staff have told me that you've seemed happier?"

Happier? Most people would think of it as something positive. But Kenny only thought of it equal to being released. And that was something he couldn't let happen. At first he would've been more than ready to do anything to get home, but even though he still didn't enjoy his time inpatient he didn't feel like he could leave. Kenny wasn't afraid of his suicidal habits and everything he could do to himself at home, he was afraid of leaving Damien, the first person to fully understand him, alone to the ward.

"Uhh, fine?" he said, as usual. If the point was getting him to open up about his feelings, this room with this person was absolutely no help.

"Has there been any struggles?"

Damien's pills? Accepting that he could never kill himself for good? The fear of leaving Damien alone? The pressure to recover?

"Not really." he said, looking down at his feet.

The most effective way to get information out of him would be to tell Damien to tell the staff everything Kenny tells him, but that would be just cruel. Kenny knew that Damien would never do such a thing. Not like he was going to suggest that as a new form of therapy anyways.

"Any self-harm or suicidal thoughts?"

"No."

An easy one. Well, cursing his immortality for preventing him from killing himself might have count as a 'suicidal thought' , but could he actually talk about it? I would like to kill myself but now I'm pissed because I can't die? Believable? If he talked about it, there was a high chance of him getting a diagnosis of some schizophrenic on drugs who thinks he's immortal.

-

A bunch of useless questions and empty answers later he was back in his room. He looked at his phone and saw a new text from Craig.

Craig: Miss you, Ken.

Oh wow. Someone from the outside actually cared about him. miss you too, he typed. Ding! New message.

Craig: Can I come see you someday?

Kenny: anytime

Craig: So there's no more of those strict visitor schedules for you?

Kenny: nope, this is what good behavior brings

Hopefully that last one didn't make him sound fully recovered. Kenny didn't want to get his friends' hopes up too high for nothing.

Craig: Tomorrow?

Kenny: yea sure

He did miss Craig a lot. The only problem was his recovery-positivity. He thought Kenny was trying his hardest to get back home. But in reality Kenny was afraid. He didn't love the psych ward or his illnesses, he was just afraid he'd do something stupid the second he got out. And of course Damien wouldn't be too happy. Kenny didn't want him to start collecting pills again and maybe even go through with his original plan of overdosing.

Craig: See you soon then

Kenny: cant wait

Short and dull answers for the win. Even over texts, even to his closest friends.