You're My Light

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Sitting in my bed room I keep staring at the wall. My mind going back and forth from Colby to Kat. My mind racing with all the pain I caused him. My mind reminding me about Kat and her tricky plans.

I never wanted to hurt Colby. I don't even know how he feels but he kissed me. Does he even truly like me though? I caused him pain. I left him and for what? Another stab to my heart?

Soon I look away from the pink wall and open my bedroom door seeing Colby's door is open as well. I walk down stairs before checking everyone else's room. Empty.

Getting to the bottom of the stairs I see all the roommates in the living room. Aaron playing fortnight, Elton on his phone, Colby in the bean bag and our friend Jake watching Aaron play.

Wanting to go to the backyard and think outside I try to sneak to the backyard but with my luck I get stopped.

"Sam? Is that you?" I hear Colby's voice. I sigh but turn around and walk into the living room.

"Hi." I say looking at all the roommates. They all look at me and do small nods or small hi's.

"What are you doing?" Colby asks. I look down at him and shrug my shoulders.

"Just going to the backyard." I answer him. I look at him and give him a small smile.

"At 9:46 at night?"

"Yeah. I don't want to be in my room." I answer quietly. Not wanting to start crying or something stupid like that.

"Are you okay?"

"M' fine. I'll be outside." I say turning around and walking to the backyard. I turn on the small light we have outside and sit at the small round table.

Putting my face in my hands I feel my breathing get heavier and my eyes fill with tears.

'I love Colby. This journey has started such a long time ago but that moment on the mountain I just knew. The moment on the beach. The moment in his bedroom or the moment on the peir. He's the one and I fucked it up.' I think in my head as I quietly sob outside.

*Colby's POV*

After Sam walks outside I stand up and sit next to Elton. I carefully pull the blinds back from the window and see Sam with his head in his hands. His back moving just slightly. He then removes his hands from his face and wipes the tears away.

I soon get off the couch and make my way to the door opening it up slowly. I shut it quietly and look over at Sam.

"Sam..." I say softly. He looks up and wipes the rest of the tears away before he sits back in his chair trying to act normal and catch his breath.

"Sam. What's wrong?" I say sitting in the other chair. He slowly looks at me and shakes his head as more unshed tears form in his eyes.

"Sam..."

"I just ------ I'm a screw up." Sam says as the unshed tears make there way down his cheeks like if a dam just broke, "I've hidden my feelings. For such a long time and it ruined my realtionship with Kat.....and when I finally had to courage to tell you I was thrilled.

Nothing had ever been better than spending time with you and being with you and I ruined it. I ruined my realtionship and friendship with Kat. I ruined my realtionship and friendship with you and...." Sam pauses as he breaks down in a sob. I quickly stand up and kneel in front of him embracing him.

"You're my angel Colby and when I hurt my angel it hurts me because nothing, not even the devil himself can make me feel so much pain.

I - I love you Cole Brock and you brighten up my day everyday and I'm so scared you truly don't want me.....god." Sam finishes with another heart breaking sob. I rub his back until he finally calms down.

"Sam never in a million years will I ever, ever, let you go. I love you truly and no pain in the past will keep me from being with you today. Trust me." I tell him. He pulls away from my hug and looks at me.

"Will it be normal again?"

"Of course."

"I love you. A lot."

"I love me too." I answer trying to make him laugh. Which obviously worked. He hits my shoulder but his face goes to seriousness.

"Promise me we'll be okay."

"I promise." I say hugging Sam one last time.