Player's Prayer

Player's Prayer ~ Chapter 26

Lloyd

A Week Later

Yesterday, Mama broke the news to Ant that Jas wasn't coming back. It was hard for me hearing her say it even though I already knew it was coming. Today is the day of the funeral. I'm going to my woman's funeral. We ain't even grow old with each other yet. She didn't get to live to see 23. Her birthday is in 2 months.

"Daddy, is Mommy in that box?" Ant asked me while holding onto my hand.

"Yeah." I said looking at it. I looked over at Mama and she was crying her eyes out. Sean looked like he was stuck, like he couldn't quite put together why his sister, his baby sister, was laying in a casket life less. I then looked at Michelle, she was crying while Danny held onto her tight. She then looked my way, she had so much hate in her eyes. I looked at the picture of Jas, the one she had took when she graduated high school. She looked so beautiful, her smile and her beautiful eyes. Why couldn't it just have been me?

As we were getting the chance to say our last goodbye to Jas, everything took a turn.

"Hey baby." I started. "I never thought I would see the last chance I got to talk to you." I inhaled. "I brought Ant. He's taking it better than I expected." I sniffled. "I'm sorry." I said as I dropped the rose in the hole on top of her coffin.

"Mommy, I love you!" Ant said as he tossed his rose. I then heard Mama breaking down again.

"This is all your fault!" Michelle yelled. I looked around and saw her looking at me. "If you would've just kept your piece in your pants, she wouldn't be dead right now!" She shouted as everybody looked my way. "My sister is in a coffin because of you!" She said as she broke down crying. Danny just pulled her into his chest as he pulled her off to the side.

"Don't pay Chelle any mind. I know you ain't mean to hurt my sister." DeSean said patting me on the back. I just looked at him before grabbing Ant and leaving.

*

It was late and Ant had just went to bed. I sat there in the living room watching videos of Jas while drinking my Vodka straight up. I need this pain numbed. I just want them soft hands on my back taking my stress away, that smile that could change my mood, and the person that could keep me sane. I lost it all.

"Lloyd, stop it!" She laughed. "Leave my baby alone!"

"He's my kid too." I argued back.

"My baby boy." She said playing with his small hands. We had just got home from the hospital, it was Ant's first time being in my house.

"So now that he's here, what now?" I asked.

"We're a family."

"We already had that." I said. "Why don't you move in? So I can take care of you and my little man."

"We're still young babe."

"We've been together since what 14? You're my girl and I'ma take care of you." I said before kissing her. "Trust me, I got you." I smiled. That was the conversation that we had 2 weeks before she moved in. Soon her sister hooked her up with the job she was working at. Life seem to just start for us. 18 and already had our life planned out.

"Yo man, you good?" DeSean asked walking into the living room.

"Yeah." I sighed. "Just watching some of these videos." DeSean needed a place to stay after Mama kicked him out, Michelle didn't want him around Danny's kid, so I decided why not? I'm gonna need as much help as I can get anyways.

"I remember this one." He said sitting down. "She was so happy that day. All she was talking about was Lloyd this, Lloyd that. She had been waiting for that day all of high school." He chuckled.

"She had begged me to take her. I ain't wanna go, but I did because she only seemed to care about that one dance." I said before taking a long drink from the bottle. That shit burned the throat, but it made me feel less like shit.

"I remember when Mama used to get annoyed with Jas because she would walk around the house every morning singing your name." He chuckled. "Man, you made my sister happy, you gave her life."

"I used to. Now she has no life." I said before drinking from the bottle again.

"Hey man, calm down. Don't blame it on yourself man." He said taking the bottle from me.

"It is my fault. If I wouldn't have fucked around with that bitch, Jas would still be here." I said as it got silent. "You know, I had plans for us."

"Plans? What kind of plans?"

"I bought her a ring. When Alisha told me to leave Jas-"

"Alisha? Alisha who?"

"Alisha Thomas."

"That fucking bitch!" He stood up.

"What?"

"I used to fuck with her, took my money and then ratted me out to the feds."

"This Alisha?" I asked him pulling a picture of her up on my phone.

"That's her!" He said. "Wait, who's he?"

"That's her son Mateo." I simply said.

"Mateo..." He said lowly.

"That's his nickname, she never told me what his real name was or who the father was. Just said he doesn't know that Mateo exists."

"How old is he?"

"3 I think, probably 4 now."

"That fucking bitch." He said. "She had my kid and didn't even tell me." He said as I sat there.

"That's your kid?" I asked.

"I remember her telling me she was pregnant before she left me."

"I hope they killed her. Fucking hoe!" I said picking up the bottle again.

**********************************
Sheesh! Just a little something, something. Possibly like 2-3 more chapters before this book is over.

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