everlong

pink lines

January 2nd, 1993
"C'mon, just pee on the stick Jules!" Courtney yelled from outside of the bathroom. I sighed and swallowed hard. I felt sick as I pulled down my panties and peed onto the test.

I pulled them up. My arms shook as I placed the test on the sink. "It'll all be ok, Julia." Courtney assured once I came out. That stick makes or breaks it all for me. I feel like falling apart. I have felt that way for too long.

I paced the living room as I waited for the results. My heart was beating so fast, I thought it'd burst from my chest. I can't be pregnant with that piece of shits baby.

Lifes so funny. Just a couple days ago, the circumstances of having a baby with Dave would be less intense, but were I fucking hate him now. I don't want to have anything with him.

"Hey, its time." She said, lying a hand on my shoulder. I squeezed my eyes shut, feeling queasy. I struggled to keep tears from falling down my face.

"I can't. This was a bad idea." I said, my eyes darting every which way. She grabbed my chin, forcing me to stare into her dazzling green eyes. "You are not a pussy. You're gonna go check that stick, and whatever happens, you'll keep going." She ordered.

I huffed. "Alright, I'm ready." I said. I felt dizzy as I approached the bathroom.

Two pink lines.