Chapter 11 - Regrets

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Rosales Residence - Candelaria, Quezon

After dropping off Sunshine at her house, Benji went straight to their house which is only two houses away from the Obispo residence.  He saw Jorge alone in the garden.

“Ang bilis nyo naman, maaga ba ang closing ng Sinagtala?” Jorge asked him

“Pagod na si Sinag, we can continue the orientation tomorrow” Benji replied “Bakit tubig ang iniinom mo? May maraming beer sa ref sana humingi ka sa maid” he said

“No this is fine with me.  Nagpapaantok lang naman ako” Jorge shyly replied

“Then beer is much better.  Wait here, magpapa-serve ako sa maid.  Sasamahan kitang magpa-antok” Benjie said and went inside the house then came back after a few moments.

“Madalas ka bang umuuwi ng Candelaria?” Jorge asked to start the chat

“Yeah, simula nung nagkasakit si Tito Teddy mas dumalas ang pag-uwi ko.  Dati once a month lang to check on Sinagtala, but when he had an attack and undergoes an operation hangga’t kaya ko na every weekend nandito ako, umuuwi talaga ako” Benji replied

“Alam ba ni Sunshine ang ginagawa mo para kay Mang Teddy?” Jorge asked

“I don’t know.  Why, does she really have to know?” Benji asked

“Why not, baka mabawasan ang galit nya sa yo” Jorge said

“Mukhang hindi na maaalis ang galit ni Sinag sa akin” Benji sadly replied

“Kung sa akin naman rin mangyari yung ginawa nyo kay Sinag malamang naipakulam ko pa kayo ni Trisha” Jorge said

“It was all Trisha’s scheme para mawala ang concentration ni Sinag sa studies nya at bumaba ang rank nya.  Alam mo namang best friend ni Trisha si Helen kaya syempre yun ang gusto nyang maging valedictorian” Benji said

“And we all know how much Trisha was smitten on you. Ang masama alam mo ang scheme ni Trisha but you did not warn Sinag about it.  I think that was the one that hurt her most, now can you blame her if she doubted on your friendship, before pa naman kayong naging magkaibigan ni Sinag, sumasama ka na sa tropa nila Trisha” Jorge said

“I did not know that it will go that far.  When Trisha stopped sending her the cards and the flowers, I thought nakamove-on na si Trisha.  I was not able to anticipate that she will drop the bomb that easy” Benji said 

“Grabe hindi na kayo naawa kay Sinag.  Her mother was very sick that time and we all knew na malaki na ang nagagastos nila para sa pagpapagamot ni Aling Sally.  Alam mo ba kung gaano pinaghirapan ni Sinag na ma-maintain nya na maging number one sa batch natin? Halos hindi na yan natutulog kasi habang nag-aaral kailangang alagaan din nya ang Nanay nya at gawin ang mga gawaing bahay dahil si Mang Teddy ang nagbabantay sa tindahan.  Laging nga nyang sinasabi na yung scholarship lang ang pag-asa nya para makapag-aral sya ng college dahil hindi na nila kayang makapag-college sya kasi nga kailangang bayaran yung loan sa bangko. Alam mo naman na dito sa bayan natin yung valedictorian at salutatorian lang ang pwedeng bigyan ng full scholarship.  Sa sitwasyon nila Sinag noon, hindi nila kakayanin ang dagdag na gastuhin. Kaya nga vocational course lang ang makuha ni Sinag, yun lang kasi ang libre at walking distance lang from their house” Jorge explained

“I know that kasi hanggang kanina, binanggit nya yun kasi nasabi kong employee ng Sinagtala si Helen at hindi nakatapos ng college kasi nabuntis agad.  Lalo yatang sumama ang loob, naalala na naman na sa kanya dapat yung scholarship na sinayang ni Helen” Benji said

“You have no idea on what Sinag have gone through just to save their house and business from the bank.  She did not work as IT clerk alone in Singapore, nag part-time din sya as domestic helper.  Ayaw nyang ipaalam sa Tatay nya kasi baka daw bigla syang pauwiin.  Kahit sa Paris, grabe din ang experience ni Sinag sa discrimination mabuti na lang at matibay ang dibdib ng kaibigan kong yun” Jorge said

“She did all that?” Benji surprisedly asked

“Yes, so she has all the rights to be this bitter and mad at you.  Isa pa yang si Trisha, I really hope na hindi sila magkita ni Sinag at baka sabunutan sya ulit ng kaibigan ko.  Ang tutoo Benji ikaw ang sinisisi ko sa mga nangyari kay Sinag eh.  Sana sinabi mo na lang sa kanya ang tutoo na hindi naman ikaw ang talagang nagpapadala nung mga sulat at bulaklak sa kanya. Kasi matagal ka nang crush ni Sinag, kaya ganun na lang sya naging ka-vulnerable. I know, it was all part of Trisha’s scheme.  Kaya lang nakihalo ka pa sa kalokohan ng gagang yun eh” Jorge said

“Akala ko kasi ayos lang na wag ko nang sabihin sa kanya na hindi sa akin galing ang lahat ng yun.  Pero yung nararamdaman ko para sa kanya, yun ang sigurado ako na tutoong galing sa puso ko.  I like her so much, I just don’t know how to approach her so when Trisha came up with that scheme hinayaan ko na lang kasi it was at my advantage anyway” Benji said

“Kung hindi ka ibinuko ni Trisha, the scheme would definitely be at your advantage.  But you know that Trisha likes you so much Benji kaya sinabi agad nya kay Sinag ang tutoo kasi nakikita nyang hulog ang loob nyo ni Sinag sa isa’t-isa” Jorge said

“And Sinag started to hate me since then.  Lahat ng sinabi ko hindi na nya pinaniwalaan, pati yung tutoong feelings ko pinagdudahan na nya. Pati apology ko pinagdudahan din na hindi daw sincere” Benji said

“I don’t find it sincere too.  It sounds like you should not be blamed because it was Trisha who started it all.  Where infact you should also be blame for keeping it from Sinag” Jorge said

“I know and I am really sorry for that” Benji sincerely said

“We don’t know until when she will hate you.  Maybe the universe is giving you this chance to show and make Sinag feels how much you are sorry on what happened before.  One of these days, maybe she will realize that she needs to let go na rin for her own peace of mind.  It’s been a long time since I saw her smile that reaches her eyes.  That was the time that she still believes that you like her too” Jorge said

“But I really do like her, hanggang ngayon” Benji admitted

“But that is not what she believes in now, since the incident” Jorge said

“I really hope she'll give me the chance to prove to her how sorry I am” Benji said

“Then let’s just see where destiny would take the two of you.  Malay mo naman, since magiging madalas na kayong magkasama ngayon sa trabaho, she’ll begin to loosen up and finally give you the forgiveness that you have been asking for.  I honestly wanted my old Sinag back,  the girl who is vibrant and full of positivity in life.  I wanted her to move on from her hatred to you and Trisha so she could start trusting other people again.  So that she’ll start believing that she is not only likeable but she is lovable too.  I hope she’ll stop shielding herself from people who wanted to sincerely show their love for her” Jorge said

“People like you Jorge?” Benji straightly asked

“Yes people like me.  I love Sinag so much Benji and I really pray for her happiness.  And I know it will only happen once she takes out that anger in her heart and it will only happen if she finally forgives you” Jorge said

“I hope so Jorge, I sincerely hope so” Benji replied

“Mauna na akong magpahinga Benji, kaninang madaling araw pa ako gising eh.  Thank you for the accommodation by the way” Jorge said

“Anytime Jorge, no problem.  Ubusin ko lang ‘to magpapahinga na rin ako” Benji replied.

Jorge left Benji alone in the garden in deep thought.  He began pondering about what happened in the last semester of their high school life. He already like Sinagtala Obispo since elementary but he does not have the courage to tell her what he feels until the incident happened and Sinag never trusted him again.

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It seems that you really needs to deeply ponder on what happened in the past. Parang hindi yan kaya ng isang boteng beer lang Benjamin Rosales. 😔😧😩

Thank you guys for the reads and votes 😚🤗😚🤗😚🤗

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