Secret Seduction | [R-18]

Chapter Fifty One

ANDREA

I've been staring at Justin's face for a couple of minutes now. I woke up earlier than usual because of what happened yesterday. Marami akong realization na ginawa habang nakahiga.

Did I miss him? No, because we're always together. Hindi naman siya nawawala eh.

Did I miss being intimate with him? Fuck yeah.

Do I still love him? I have no fucking clue.

Pero narealize ko rin na hindi na tama na nasa relasyon pa rin kami ni Louie. I mean, don't get me wrong, we've been nothing but great. Pero 'yun kasi yung problema eh. Our relationship seems too perfect that it scares me sometimes. I feel like he has an inner self that he's not showing to me.

Or not. Baka gumagawa lang ako ng dahilan para makipaghiwalay sakanya. Nonetheless, hindi fair na magstay ako sa relationship namin na hindi naman ako sigurado sa nararamdaman ko.

I sat down to grab my phone but I felt Justin toss around the bed and stretch. He reached for my head and scratched it as he yawned, "Good morning."

"Get up. We need to talk." sabi ko at napahilamos ng mukha. Naglagay ako ng t-shirt dahil nandidiri ako sa katawan ko. It took him seconds, looking around the room, sighing, also just sinking in to him, "Right. What do you want to talk about?"

"Me? Bigla ka nalang sumabog saakin kagabi!" I can clearly remember how upset he was with me, all of a sudden, he confesses like a motherfucker. He snorted,

"I know."

"Kadiri ka, seryoso nga! Louie's gonna be so upset if he found out." hinampas ko siya at napatakip ng mukha sa stress na dumaloy sa katawan ko. "Mali 'to eh. Puta."

"Andrea." sabi niya at binaba yung kamay ko at pinatingin ako sakanya. "I meant what I said last night. Ikaw ba?"

"Anong ako?"

"Do you still love me?" he asked with his eyes staring down my soulless body.

I looked away and said, "I honestly don't know."

"What? You just slept with me." kumunot ang ulo niya at parang nainis sa sinabi ko. I faced forward, while he stays looking at my side, "That's different."

"How is that different?" he shot back.

"Hindi ko alam, okay? I'm still confused at what's happening. I need to cook breakfast, bathe the kids, fold the clothes that I dried yesterday, at may trabaho rin ako ngayon. I can't do this right now." sabi ko at tumayo para takasan siya. I have a good idea of what my feelings are right now, but I don't want to answer with pressure.

I was beating the eggs when I heard the door open, it was Justin following me. Tumalikod ako at inalagay sa frying pan yung binabate ko at pina init na rin yung kanin kagabi. I took out the remaining hotdogs from the fridge and opened it, while facing him. It was a bad idea. He gave me a strange look to tease me about what I did last night as he raises one of his eyebrows.

"Stop." inis kong sabi at tumalikod ulit. Ang dugyot, nakakaasar.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Did you forget how wild you were last night? I'm sure, I didn't." my shoulders dropped dead and was about to respond but I could hear the kids cry already. Alam na niyang drill yun kaya dumiretso na siya sa kwarto.

"Good morning daddy! Good morning mommy!" sabay nilang bati habang kinukusot pa yung mata.

"You guys stink." pang aasar ni Justin sa mga bata. Hindi maipinta yung mukha nilang dalawa, parang naiiyak na galit.