one day | e.d

| twenty seven |

i let out a staggered and shaky breath as i looked down at ethan's letter, the small sheet of paper rattling in my hands out of nerves.

the paper was stained with tears, the black writing smudged, and barely readable.

it was then that i looked down at the water beneath the bridge, my hand slowly letting go of the letter, dropping it. i watched as it fell from my hands, drifting down towards the stream, and soon being engulfed by the aggressive waters.

i kept the black box in my lap, staring down at the beautiful drawings. my heart broke all over again at the sight, as if it hadn't broke enough in the past week.

i pulled the pen out of my pocket, my hand shaking as i pulled out the stack of drawings, and began writing on the back of them.

ethan

i'm happy i got to give you your
second chance at life, e.

you gave me one, too.
but i've wasted it.

i'm sorry.
- mol

i let out a cry as i shoved the papers back into the box, scribbling out my nickname from the top, and replacing it with ethan.

i set it down in our usual spot, the wind blowing through the air, sending my long red hair above my head.

i found myself looking out at the forest, once again. for one final time, i was staring at the large trees, dark night sky, and stars. except this time, the one glowing star was gone.
ethan, was gone.
he was my glowing star.

i let out a sigh as i stood up, clinging onto the railing tightly. my heart felt as if it were being squeezed in someone's hand, their fingers digging into it, causing me so much agony.

i climbed over the railing, my lungs feeling as if they were being deprived of oxygen as i sucked in a breath. i hadn't stood here, in this position since last year.

an even larger gush of wind made me let out a quiet cry, as i leant back against the bar, my hands holding tightly onto the metal railing.

" just do it, molly, just jump "
i told myself, my eyes squeezing shut as i sucked in a breath, the cold air turning my fingertips red.
i let out another breath, my eyes pearing down at the stream, my heart speeding up rapidly just at how high i was.
" jump. get away from him, away from it all. come on " i was murmuring this under my breath, letting go of the bar hesitantly.

one step forward, and it'll all end.
with that thought rushing through my mind, I took a step, my foot hovering over the edge; until a sudden deep voice spoke up,
startling me slightly.
" don't do it "

i felt the tears begin to stream once again, as i thought back to the moment ethan came to the bridge, the moment he saved my life. the moment he stopped me from doing something i'd regret.

he wasn't here to stop me, now.

with that thought in mind i glanced back down at the water, my eyes staring at the waves which crashed against the rocks. the waves would feel like a thousand sharp knives in my body, because of the cold temperatures.