Started with a cookie... Marcus and Martinus

Part 19: I trust you

"... And it's been 3 years since everyone calls me "the joke". I have no idea what I had done to deserve all this. I mean wearing ripped jeans all the time and coming to school on a skateboard aren't an excuse to hate on me. They also make fun of me because i'm always alone, reading a book and not paying attention to what happens around me. Apparently, they consider you a nerd if you do that."

I took a deep breath then continued talking to Martinus who was looking at me with curious eyes:

"And when I met you, I thought if I wrote a song for someone that matters, they will stop bullying me. But I guess I was wrong because things got worse. I didn't become popular, i'm still an idiot. I'm sorry!"

I hope Martinus doesn't get mad because I don't want to lose a friend.

But after all, I trust him and i'm sure he'll understand what I'm going through and try to help me.

The room was silent. Martinus hasn't spoken a word which made me regret telling him my story.

But then, his soft voice made me look straight into his eyes:

"Look Maria, that's okay you don't need to apologize. You weren't selfish at all, you worked your hardest to come up with the song, and even if your heart wasn't totally in it, that doesn't matter. What matters is that now the song is being played all over the world. And guess who wrote that hit who is now top 1 in most of the Scandinavian countries? You! So believe in yourself and don't let anyone drag you down.

The haters will always hate, that's what they're good at. And you have two options: either you run from who you are, or you stand up, you walk, and let them talk whatever they want.

Have faith in yourself Maria, you're really brave and talented. You proved  to them that they are wrong, and only strong people do that. And of course they will try to make you feel weak, just because they are jealous of your success. So you need to let go."

While saying these words, I felt like Martinus and I flew to another, better world where only him and I exist. Our hearts were beating as one.

He took my heart, my soul. He saved my life. Without him by my side, my heart doesn't beat at all.

His hand on my shoulder, made me go back to reality.

"Are you okay?", i heard him saying.

I looked in his eyes. No. I'm not okay. I'm falling in love with someone that I know will never be mine. The scars on my heart are giving me more pain each day. The wounds are drowning me, and I don't think I can survive without him...

"I'm fine." I said that while trying to avoid any weird eye contact. I had to pretend that everything's alright. Because when everybody else thinks you're fine, sometimes you forget for a while that you're not.

But that someone wasn't Martinus. Without even speaking a word, he knows what I am thinking about and if i'm okay or not, he knows if I need a shoulder to cry on or not.

I know it isn't a long time since we met, but I think we became so close to each other, we think in the exact same way, we relate to the exact same things, we breathe as one, we live as one.

If only we can hold hands and fly to another planet, away from all the pain and hurt I have been experimenting...

"You know what Maria, I think you need to get some fresh air. How about we go and have dinner tomorrow?"

My jaw dropped. Did he just ask me on... a date? I just want to scream and hug him tight, but calm down Maria. Be cool!

But then he added: "Don't get me wrong, it's not a date! We'll just try to make you feel better!"

Make be feel better? I just got "friend zoned".

I think I need to give him some time.

Because love takes time, love is tough. And there's no need to rush. If something is meant to be, it will happen, in the right time, with the right person, for the best reason...