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80

RaeJae's POV:

"Thinking about it now, I knew that becoming an idol would challenge me a lot, but I didn't realize it would start to burden me on a personal level, you know?" I think out loud to Jin.

Him and I are the only two awake after all this waiting.

"I can't even remember the moment I started to like Yoongi Hyung... it just started at some point I guess," I continue.

I look over to Jin, seeing him thoughtfully listening.

"And this whole me calling all of you 'hyung' thing never really bothered me once I got used to it. At first I was worried I was going to be seen as disrespectful but then I came to terms with the concept aspect of it. But then I realized that by calling you 'hyung', I may have sacrificed some of my femininity,"

Jin shakes his head, "a single word can't take that away from someone like you. You're sincere, so by calling us 'hyung' doesn't change how others perceive you. Besides, if you called me 'oppa' right now I'd find it strange," He starts to laugh.

"But what do you think about Yoongi Hyung and I?" I ask curiously.

He stops to think for a moment, rolling his sleeves up in the process. It's moments like these where I truly see Jin's age difference between mine. Every decision he makes has a purpose, and usually has been thought out before doing so.

"It's hard for me to give you advice," He answers honestly, "because I've known about Yoongi's feelings for you for a while, but I know that he never planned to act on them,"

I feel a slight ping in my heart followed by a sad feeling in my stomach. Jin notices my facial expression fall, immediately shaking his head.

"It's not a bad thing, trust me. He cares a lot about how others see you, and how you will never be able to be open about your relationship... at least for a long time. In a way he's also protecting himself. There was this one time after the meeting about you and Jungkook dating where he came to talk to me privately. I already knew what it was about, but basically he decided to distance himself from you because he felt that Jungkook was much better for you anyway,"

I can't help the frown that comes to my face, "I feel really guilty about how I've treated Jungkook,"

"Don't. If anything he'll become stronger because of this. You and him are still young and sometimes he can be a bit immature, but that's just life. Give it time and everything will work out," He sends me a gentle smile.

"So are you saying I should wait for Yoongi Hyung?" I raise my eyebrows in question.

"Well, He sort of already confessed... but you turn 18 in a few months. So I'd at least wait until then," He replies carefully.

I nod.

"But," he pauses for a moment, "I mean this with the best intentions, okay? We signed a contract, and relationships within the group and in general were prohibited. Although I support you two, I want you to think about the rest of us,"

"What do you mean?"

"This is the worst case scenario, but unfortunately I wouldn't put it past PD-Mom to lower the hammer on you two if it jeopardized his company... and most importantly, our group," He whispers the last part softly.

"I don't want that to happen..." I trail off.

"But, the best advice anyone has ever gave me was to follow my heart. So I say the same to you," He says in a confident voice which gives me some hope.

"Thank you, Jin Hyung," I smile.

"No problem," I smiled back, "...is this when I give her the talk?"