He Heals Me

Chapter 14: Continued

Disclaimer: This chapter contains violence and strong emotional triggers. Please read at your own risk and if you ever need someone to talk to my inbox is always open.

Kina POV

I came back to reality noticing Larry hadn't spoke a word this entire time. I knew he was listening and taking notes, but he hadn't so much as made a sound. I lifted my gaze from staring at the floor in from of me. I looked at him and he looked saddened by my story. Our eyes remained locked for a while before he spoke.

Lar: Kina...what else did he do to you?
Kina: A number of things...
Lar: Would you like to tell me about that? You don't have to if it's too hard.

I thought before answering and decided on a memory that I would never forget.

Kina: There was this one time...

Kina's memory

I remember one day we were into it so bad that I was like I'm done. I put my drawstring backpack on my back and stormed out of his house. I was going home and away from his shit. He followed me outside and tried to snatch my bag from me saying he wanted the camera he bought me back. DD knew how much I loved taking pictures and just wanted to hurt my feelings but I wouldn't let him have it back. I wrapped the drawstring around my arm to keep a good grip so he couldn't take it. He threw me on the ground but I got up quickly keeping the bag away from him. When he finally grabbed ahold of it, he yanked at it relentlessly causing the rope to burn my arm. I still have those scars today. They've shrunk and faded but they're still there. He smashed my face into the ground and unwrapped the bag from my now laceration covered arm. He took the camera out and threw it against the nearest tree making it shatter into pieces. I just laid on the ground out of breath from the struggle and my crying. When I had gathered enough strength I got up and grabbed my now ripped bag. I didn't look at him as he stood still watching me, his chest heaving in his anger. As far as I was concerned he had won and I was giving up. I walked over to the pieces of my camera and ejected the memory card from the half that held it. Thankfully it was unharmed. I made sure none of my other things had fallen from my bag and I started walking home. I stared at the ground as I walked past him. Neither of us spoke. I had tears still streaming down my face when I made it home. I had luckily walked in the house and shut the door right before my mom pulled up. I ran into my bathroom to take a look at myself.

My face dirty and I had grass in my hair. My eyes were swollen from crying and my clothes were a mess. I took everything off and got in the shower hoping that would help. The hot water burned on my arm with the rope burns but I washed it anyway. I washed my hair and got out going straight to my room. My mom came knocking but I told her I'd be out when I was dressed. I put on a long sleeve shirt to cover the red marks on my arm. I didn't wear makeup so the bruise on my forehead would be noticeable but I just lied saying it happened at basketball practice. I wanted to tell someone but with that admission I felt that I told you so was the first thing I would hear. Afraid of judgment I kept it to myself.

We were separated for a week before he came back to me begging. I only lasted two more days before I gave in and met up with him. He said sweet sorries and kissed my wounds that he caused. I knew he had real feelings for me. He just hadn't grown up enough to know that he didn't need to be a player to be the man. I went back to him. I thought the worst was behind us but it was yet to come.

DD was like any eighteen year old male. He liked to have sex far more than I did at the time. I didn't want to be another teenage mom walking through high school so I kept myself from him as much as possible. One night he had had enough of my stallings. He took me on a drive out to our spot in the woods. A place where we went to watch the stars and talk once upon a time. He tried to get me to have sex with him but it was that time of the month so I thought I had lucked out. As you could guess I was once again wrong...

He took me into the backseat rubbing my stomach asking if I had cramps and cooing sweet nothings into my ear. I relaxed and told him I was fine. He laid me down on the seat and we made out for a while before I felt him fiddling with my tights to remove them. I panicked. I tried to get away but he pinned me down. I screamed but he covered my mouth. He pulled my tights down passed my bottom and pushed my legs back. I fought and clawed at him. He just grabbed my hands pinning them down. He slid himself inside my other hole...He....he....

Author POV

Larry couldn't bear to hear another word but knowing he couldn't rush to Kina and hold her, he just spoke. Kina was crying and stuttering over words.

L: You don't have to continue.
K: I never said it out loud before.*gasps as she sobs* The first man I ever loved raped me and I never told anyone.
L: Can you tell me what happened that ended the relationship? Did it end there?
K: *chuckles in disbelief * Of course not. I let him tell me that it was hormones and everything else in the book besides rape. I took him back. It wasn't until months later that I found out that he got another girl pregnant that it ended. I came to his house and confronted him with what the girl had told me. We fought and truly scared for my life I grabbed a butchers knife from the kitchen and cut him across his arm. It wasn't deep enough to stop him. He grabbed his gun from under his bed and held it the my head while he choked me. He said if I ever touched him like that again he would kill me. I believed him. At this point, I felt I had fought to be with someone so unworthy for so long that I had found clarity. I left him that day and never looked back. I let her have him. He tried to get me back but I was lost myself and if I couldn't find my way back to me; how could I find my way back to him?
L: He never deserved you.
K: He didn't have to. I felt like I deserved him. At least who he was when he was at his best.
L: That's not a healthy way to think of it.
K: If I did have a healthy way to think of it, do you think I'd need to be here?
L: You have a point. I'm glad you shared that with me.
K: I'm glad you listened.
L: That seems to be our time for today. I will walk you out and go over my notes with Dr. Lynn.
K: Ok.
L: *hands Kina tissues for her face* Come on let's go.

Author POV

The two walked out of the session room side by side. Larry walked Kina all the way to her car and assured her he would be over later to comfort her after the day's revelations. She didn't hesitate to accept the offer. He closed her car door once she was inside after insisting that she send him a text so he knows she made it home. Larry turned and walked back inside as silent tears began to fall from his face. He walked into the observation room. When Doc looked up, she wasn't surprised at the hurt in his face.

Lar: You did not tell me that he raped her!!!

His voice was deep and filled with hatred. The words pained his throat to even let them escape.

Doc: Well if you were listening to her, she told you the answer to the question in your mind. She told no one. I was just as taken off guard as you were in that moment.
L: How could someone do that to such a young girl? A girl who love him despite all he had done?!
Doc: We will never know the answer to that.
L: I could kill him right now with my bare hands!
Doc: And then what?! They would lock you away and then where would Kina be huh?! She has lost enough! Don't add to it.
L: I don't understand this at all. *Larry crumpled into the chair next to Dr. Lynn*
Doc: Have you ever wondered why medicine is considered a practice? It's not set in stone. Experiences and outcomes vary from person to person. You'd do well to learn that if nothing else. We will never understand everything.
L: Doc, I'm done for the day. I need to go clear my head before I see her tonight.
Doc: Word of advice...just be gentle with her. Follow her lead. Don't try to fix anything outside of here.
L: I wouldn't know where to start even if I tried.

With that Larry gathered his things and went home. He took a shower and tried to clear his head before getting ready to go to Kina's house. He only knew one thing for sure. Kina had anchored herself to a place in his heart that only she could detach herself from. He hoped she would choose to stay there.

A/N: Ok! I know this chapter is kinda heavy but when I'm feeling inspired I try to give you guys as much as I can. As always vote and comment loves!😘