He Heals Me

Chapter 23: A Necessary Conversation

Kina POV

      I was so nervous when I heard the buzzer for downstairs. I knew it was Larry without even asking. I pushed the button to let him up and went to the door to wait for him. In hindsight, I probably should have just answered a message or a call. I know he must feel a way about all of this. I stand in my doorway watching the numbers light up on the elevator signifying his ascent. When it dings on my floor, my heart drops to my stomach in anticipation. The doors open and I see him, just as beautiful as the day we met, but then I saw his tears. I know I did this. I did this to him. I can see all the emotions he's felt the last few days flash across his teary eyes. It hurt. I began to cry too, unable to speak or move forward to comfort him. But then again, I didn't have to to because he soon walked quickly toward me picking me up from the floor. I wrapped my legs around him to keep from falling. He took us into my apartment to my couch. His grip hadn't loosened on me a bit. It was almost painful, but I wanted to be just as close to him as he wanted to be to me right now. We stayed that way for a while, just holding each other in a therapeutic silence. I knew I had to explain myself and I would soon but I just needed another moment of his embrace. When I moved back from him to look at his face he hesitated to let me put space between us. I brought a hand to his cheek and that seemed to help him loosen up a little. I looked at his face wiping his shed tears from his cheek. His eyes were closed, not looking at me.

K- I'm so sorry Larry.
L- *clears throat* You don't have to do that.

I cup his cheek in my palm and he grabs it with his hand nuzzling closer.

K- Yes, I do. I hurt you. I can see it.
L- I just want to know what happened. Why didn't I hear from you?
K- The first couple of days, it was like I went back to a bad place. A place I really thought I would never be in again. I was there right after Jordan. I felt paralyzed. I couldn't stop crying. I didn't eat. Dr. Lynne was right. I'm not healed enough to not go back there like I thought I was. If this doesn't work out I'm going to go back to drowning, when I finally felt like I was learning to swim. It took three days for me to pull myself out of that funk. Then I had to recover physically for two days. The rest of the time I spent thinking about us and what I could do differently but I don't see it. I only see me with you.
L- Is that so bad?
K- What if it doesn't last?
L- But what if it does? *open eyes*
K- Larry... we can't know that.
L- The only way I'll leave is if you send me away.
K- I know but my behavior at times is hard to deal with. What are you going to do when I stop eating again or when I cry for days and can't figure out what's wrong? You can't stop that.
L- I'll love you through it.
K- That didn't exactly go so well for me before.
L- Before wasn't with me.
K- Larry try to understand. It's not to say that you're not capable. This is something that I need to fix within myself first. You know this better than anyone. I need to be a whole person first.
L- So after saying you love me and making love, you want to take it back?
K- No! I love you Larry. That won't change. I just need to learn to love myself more and if you're still here with me then I'm here too. I just need you to know what we're up against before you make these sacrifices. I don't want to hurt you anymore.
L- Then don't. I'm here Kina and I love you so much. I was worried that something bad had happened and I couldn't be there for you. If we do this, you can learn to do it alone but you can't go dark on me like that again.
K- I can only promise to try my best.
L- I'll take what I can get as long as it comes with a side of you.
K- * giggles* Larry!
L- *sniffles before chuckling * Can you manage a kiss right now? I could use some love over here.
K- Yeah I think I can do that.

I lean forward and kiss his lips. I didn't realize how much I missed them. The kiss was soft and delicate like we both might break at the slightest pressure. Our lips parted with a soft pop.  He leaned his forehead against mine closing his eyes again.

L- I'm sorry too.
K- Larry you have no reason to be sorry.
L- I'm being selfish. I act like you're all better when I know you have things to work through. I just thought the worst when you stopped responding to my calls and texts.
K- I don't blame you. I will say that I wouldn't do that. I'm never going to hurt myself again. No matter how I feel. I've been the loved one left behind before okay so I'm never going to do that to someone else.
L- Okay okay. I promise to give you space in these moments and not rush your progress. If you do need me for anything though, please reach out to me. I can silently support from the sidelines.
K- Will do. So you still mad at me?
L- Nah. I tried but as soon as I saw you it was over for that.
K- Awwwww.
L- Don't start it.
K- Well what now?
L- How about food? I'm hungry. Didn't exactly feel like breakfast this morning..
K- Well lets get my baby fed then. You want me to cook or you want to go out?
L- *flips hair dramatically* I look horrible. I can't let people see me like this.
K- *laughs out loud* Fine. To the kitchen I go.

Author POV

When Kina goes to get up from Larry's lap, he stops her placing his hands on top of her thighs. He becomes very aware of the small shorts, loose tank that she's wearing and how she's not wearing a bra. He feels how warm his lap was with her sitting on him. Kina looks at him in confusion before noticing the new dark look in his eyes. She stills in his grasp seemingly entranced by his stare. He leans forward quickly and captured her lips in his. The kiss conveyed how much he had missed her presence. It was hard and hungry. Kina didn't care where the sudden shift came from. She welcomed his affection pulling Larry impossibly close. He wrapped his strong arms around her in return, taking a firm grasp of the nape of her neck in one hand. He licked the seam of her lips and when she parted her lips, he slid his tongue into her mouth. They tongue wrestled until they both needed air. They separated for a moment, panting into each other's faces.

K- Ummm, where did that come from?
L- You're sitting on me in next to no clothes. I just noticed. It's probably bad timing.
K- No. I like it. *blushes*
L- Oh I know. I remember you like when I'm aggressive. *smirks*
K- On that note, I'm going to go make you some breakfast. You're free to come keep me company if you like.
L- I'd like that.

Larry stands up carrying a laughing Kina into her kitchen. She proceeds to cook them both a nice breakfast with eggs, bacon, pancakes and a fruit medley on the side. The two piled their meals on a tray and Larry carried it over to the dining room table. They spent some time catching up and eating. When all the food was gone, they got up and washed all the dishes together before retiring to the couch for cartoons and cuddles. This went on for the rest of the day. Just enjoying each other's company. Night fell and Larry being the gentleman he is, checks the hour finding it to be kind of late.

L- When you get tired, just let me know. I'll head out.
K- You don't want to stay?
L- I wasn't sure if you wanted me to.
K- Well...I do. If you want to that is.
L- I'll stay Kina.
K- Yaaaaaaayyyyy!

Kina snuggles under Larry more before deciding they'd be better off in her room where they had more room to lay down. She gets up dragging Larry with her upstairs to the bedroom. She turns on her tv before beginning to undress more for bed, leaving only her lace panties on. Larry just stands at the door staring at how nonchalant Kina is about undressing in front of him this way. When she climbs onto the bed, she turns to look over her shoulder seeing Larry stuck at the door.

K- Are you coming?
L- Is this how you're going to sleep?
K- Yes. This is how I always sleep.
L- Lord save me.
K- Oh stop it. It's not like you haven't seen it before. Now come over here, I want snuggles.
L- God you're so adorable.

Larry slides out of his clothes leaving only his briefs and socks and climbs into bed behind Kina. He wraps him arms around her bringing them close. They watched tv until Larry noticed Kina had dozed off. He gave her forehead a kiss and said goodnight before turning off the tv and attempting to get some shut eye himself.

A/N: Comment and vote as always and I'll see you guys soon! Good bye for now my lovelies!😘