Salvation

22 ∆ undressed

        I kind of tried to leave, but I couldn't. It was impossible with Matthew there. And it was bizarre, too.

But things were getting slightly better when he and I were finally back in the bedroom, kissing and talking, the guys had left, and Harvey drove Louis back to his mum's and then went home as well. We had the place all to ourselves and as uncomfortable as I could have felt because of that, it wasn't bad at all. I liked it, as I liked Matthew, and as I liked the wine we didn't stop drinking all night.

''Hey, sweetheart,'' Matthew whispered against my neck. ''…wanna see something cool?''

''Uh, yeah, alright.'' I smiled, kissing his temple.

He smirked and in a second he was out of the bed, going downstairs somewhere, and a few minutes later he had returned with some stuff in his hands. 

He placed the items on the black desk at the corner of the room and started fixing things. When he was done he asked me to go over and I did, only half aware of what was happening.

''Here,'' He held my hand as he both kneeled down and sat cross legged in front of the table, where some razors and white powder lines laid. ''do as I do, right?''

I grinned, ''right.''

Matthew let go of my hand and used it to press one of his nostrils, and then inhaled. He sat back and for a few seconds just stared at nothing, holding his nose with his hand, and then tapped my back signalling for me to go and do the same.

I did, and within a few minutes I was in a rush, feeling on top of the world and having the time of my life.

That was basically a summary of the day, night and morning after, when I finally decided it was best to leave. But guess what? Matthew wouldn't let me.

''Darlin', c'mon, come with me to the studio. It's only Friday morning…''

''Yeah, exactly, I'm already missing school for you, and we have the whole rest of the weekend.'' I answered, pulling on my shirt and fixing my hair as best as I could.

''Don't be a little bitch, come back here.'' He grinned as he pulled my wrist quickly and with strength and made me lose balance, and then I consequently fell back on the bed on top of him. 

I sighed heavily as he laughed in that childish way, throwing back his head and clutching his stomach, but still having a tight grip on me with his other hand.

Incredibly annoying, incredibly adorable.

***

Finally, Matthew had convinced me to go to their studio slash recording place, where they also rehearsed for gigs and stuff. But before, and I quote, ''we have to take a nice bath together''.

But detail, it wasn't any bath. It was in the pool outside. Middle of June, air still slightly cold, having rehearsal at 2pm and already being 1:30, but nevertheless he dragged me to the pool area.

''What are you planning on doing, just throwing me clothed in the water?'' I asked as he wrapped his lanky arms around me tightly pressing my face against his bare chest and started walking backwards, towards the pool with crystal clear water.

''That would do,'' He chuckled. ''but I'd much rather throw you in there with no clothes at all.''

''Well,'' I grinned, slowly running my tongue across his chest as he laughed. ''that can happen. Maybe.''

''Maybe?'' He asked with a puppy face when we were right at the edge of the blue marble pool. ''How so?''

''If you let go of me,'' I wriggled under his grip and he laughed. ''I might get undressed for you.''

''Oooh,'' He mused. ''We might have a deal here…'' He started loosening his grip and I took my chance to run away, laughing. 

''I'm not that easy, you fool!'' I yelled from the grass pathway that lead to the other side of the house.

''Oh, you didn't!''

And there begun the chase around his house, Matthew wanting to grab and undress me, and me wanting to avoid that.

But I was just teasing.

I wanted to get undressed for him, too.

I wanted to make him happy and give him things, like blowjobs and self-esteem, and whatever else made that adorable smile of his show.

And so, when he caught up to me in the backyard area, quite near to the pool actually, I didn't run anymore. I just backed away, knowing the wall was somewhere behind me, until I was pressed against it and Matthew had that massive grin plastered on his face, his arms already pulled out in front of him, ready to hold me again.

''Well, well, well,'' He started. ''we meet again…''

''We meet again.'' I repeated, smirking lightly as I crossed my arms over my stomach and held the hem of his oversized black 'whatevs' shirt that I had unceremoniously borrowed, and pulled it over my head, revealing my navy bra and my scarred body.

''Surrendering so easily?'' He raised his eyebrows as he got closer and closer at a slow pace.

I shrugged, ''I don't want to be punished.''

''Good girl you are, then.'' He smiled, his fingertips touching my stomach. ''But there are still clothes on you.''

I slid down the boxer shorts I had also stolen from him along with my knickers and took off my bra. He grinned and slid his long fingers across my ribs, towards my back. He rested his warm hands at the small of my back as he hugged me, pressing his shirtless body against my own. I smiled lightly, nuzzling his neck and bringing my arms close to my chest.

I was always insecure, self conscious about my body. I wouldn't show it to anyone, ever. I had so many scars and I was fat and so, so ugly. But it was different with Matthew. I knew he noticed the scars and bruises, but he didn't seem to mind. He didn't ask about them. He didn't seem to care. And that was enough for me.

Matthew squeezed me in his arms and kissed my whole face before he started taking steps backwards,. I giggled like a child, knowing what was going to happen but at the same time not having any idea of why, how, or when.

And at some point there was no more concrete, just water and marble, and in a second we were both submersed in the cold clear water, no longer in each others arms but still holding hands.

When Matthew let go of my hand to take off the last piece of clothing on him too, I left and swam around, diving and letting myself float. I could feel his gaze on me and as I said, I'd usually feel uncomfortable, but honestly, I didn't. It was different. Matthew was different.

I felt his hands on my waist pulling me back towards his body, so we were pressed against each other again. I rested my head on his chest and wrapped my arms around his neck. 

''Anna...'' Matthew murmured.

''Yes?''

''You're too beautiful to have all these scars.''