Salvation

28 ∆ leave me alone

        Monday rolled around quickly and I found myself once again sprinting to school on a relatively warm morning, at precisely 9:27am, scared off my ass of what would happen to me now. I turned the corner and could already see the school gates being closed, so I ran faster. I swear, if I had been a second quicker I had managed to get in. 

But, oh no, I had to now go through the headmaster's office to get in.

And so I did; walking slowly, I turned the corner again and found the other entrance. They let me in and guided me through the corridor towards the principal. Getting there, I was expecting to receive this massive speech about how irresponsible I had been lately, missing tests and being always late for school, and then have my mother called over, but that didn't happen. The old grumpy woman had a faint smile across her face, a smile as if she was feeling sorry for me for some reason. She freed me to go to class, but said I was going to be called later on to have a word with someone else.

Well, shit.

***

''Anna Calliope?'' My English teacher called out after he was requested in the corridor mid-class.

''Um, yes sir?'' I muttered, looking up questioningly at the well-dressed teacher in his 30-something.

''Mrs. Brown wants to speak to you.''

I stood up and collected my things, walking hesitantly towards the door. Once outside, I was faced with the relatively young woman, dressed in a weird beige pantsuit thingy and a bit too much make up staring down at me with a smile.

''Y-yes?'' I stuttered.

''We need to have a talk, sweetheart. Let's go to my office, shall we?''

And so we went; I, with my hesitant, trembling steps, walking behind the confident tutor who smiled at people in the corridors, while I kept my head low with hair falling over my face as I thought desperately of what shit I had done to be taken away with Mrs Brown.

We entered her office, that I had never been in before, by the way; it was filled with what seemed to be expensive furniture, like a dark red printed carpet and a mahogany desk. She sat me down on an armchair at the corner of the room while she collected some papers around her desk and closed the blinds before sitting down on the other armchair in the room, right across from me. That reminded me quite a lot of a pshycologist's room, in a session, which made me nervous.

''So, Anna.'' She started, writing something down quickly and looking up at me.

''Yes?'' I nearly whispered.

''Do you know why you're here with me?''

I shook my head lightly.

''Well,'' She looked back down at her papers. ''we, the school commission, teachers, other tutors and the principal, have been noticing a conduct change in you in this past year.''

I didn't know how to respond, so I just nodded, looking down at my shoes, avoiding her eyes at all costs.

''... Like your arrears for class nearly every day, lowering grades, incomplete and even unmade homeworks and school works. Teachers say you don't pay attention in class, that you seem unfocused and tired.'' Mrs. Brown paused, and when she noticed I wouldn't respond, she continued. ''A couple of students came in to speak to me today. About you.''

I froze, still staring at the carpet. I stopped breathing for a few seconds and brought my arms closer to my body.

''Now, I'm not telling you who were they. But they seemed worried about you. They think you are severely depressed. They said they've seen scars on your wrists. Is that true, Anna?''

I shook my head rapidly, glancing at her for a second. Her green eyes seemed understanding, offering comfort. But I refused to take it. I refused to let myself fall into that trap. Teachers don't care. They never do. They just want to know as much as possible.

''They say they've seen you taking medicine in the bathroom. Pills from a box in your backpack. Do you have them there?''

I could feel her eyes on me and my bag. I shook my head.

''I don't take medicine.'' I mumbled.

''We want to help you, Anna.''

''I don't want your help.'' I looked at her. ''I am okay. I don't need help.'' I stood up, swinging my bag over my shoulder. ''Leave me alone.'' I muttered as I turned around and left her office, running through the corridors, going unnoticed by most students that filled the corridor as the bell indicating next class rang. But Hannah and Elle wouldn't fail to see me. And to my surprise, they weren't calling me offensive names.

''Annie! Hey, Annie!'' Elle called out, placing a hand on my shoulder as I trotted past her.

''What?'' I snapped in a low tone, looking back at her. ''Leave me alone.'' I repeated that meaningful sentence for the second time on the day, wondering when I'd say it again.

''Are you okay?''

''Not that you give a fuck, but yes.'' I muttered, looking at her.

''Oh, we understand you, Annie. Don't be angry at us, we're just worried.'' Hannah approached me, faking a massive smile and trying to pull me into a forced hug. ''Hey, Alex, come here!''

I was confused, looking at where she waved at. Peter, Jack, Jake and Alex were talking in a friendly way, a bit too friendly for my liking, and when Hannah called, they looked at us and came over, all of them faking smiles and preoccupation over me. Alex stayed aside while I tried to get his attention and ask him what the fuck was happening, but he just wouldn't listen. And then I understood it all. I understood why; I understood his actions, their actions.

It was them.

---

a/n still not the exciting part BUT I SWEAR. WE. ARE. GETTING. THERE. do not hit me pls

ok so i have to apologize for the recent short and boring chapters. i planned to make this longer and cooler, but its already 5am and i have to go to sleep because i'm going out tomorrow (not a social life; its with my mum and stepdad) and we're going to a small town where everyones always stoned and theres lots of dogs but no internet, so I FIGURED I SHOULD UPDATE FOR YOU TODAY, BEFORE I LEAVE

THANKS FOR BEING SO NICE TO ME ILY ALL especially megan, megan i love you so much i hate you

AND I HAVE NEWS

BASTILLE

IS

COMING

TO

BRAZIL

{i think, but}

YOASDAASHDGJWHKSAJDHS D POTATO I LOVE LIFE