Bad Habits || Calum Hood (DISCONTINUED)

chapter five

CALUMS POV.

I gave up on Lauren. All she had to tell me was no and I gave up. I was currently sitting at the bar in a club, ordering shots from left and right. I just wanted to get drunk to take away all of the pain. I felt dizzy, so dizzy. 

"Hey." a blonde girl walked up to me and gave me a small smile. 

"Hi." I smiled back and ordered another shot. The blonde girl just stared at me, like if I was a piece of art work. 

"It's rude to stare." I chuckled and her cheeks turned a deep shade of red. 

"Sorry." she said lowely and sat in the seat next to me. I really didn't need any girls in my life right now, I wanted to be alone and I can't understand why anyone understands that. If I couldn't have Lauren, I really didn't want anyone. 

"What's your name?" I asked, gulping down a few sips of my beer.

"Um, Riley." she looked down at her fingers and looked back up at me. 

"What about you?" she smiled at me. 

"Calum." I finished the rest of my beer and looked at her, and her brown eyes looked back at me. She gave me another smile.

"Are you trying to get drunk? You had atleast 5 drinks." she chuckled and I couldn't help but smile. No shit I was trying to get drunk, I needed too. 

"Yeah, I guess." I sighed and ordered a cup of vodka. She knitted her eyebrows together.

"Can I ask why?" she ordered a beer and turned her stool to face me. I sighed. I couldn't be this drunk to tell a stranger about my problems. 

"Recent breakup." and there goes that same pain in my chest again. The mention of Lauren just gets me so mad.

"Oh, and you think by drinking its gonna solve anything?" she rolled her eyes and I was taken back. 

"Yeah, just need to get her off my mind." I take a sip of my drink and look down at my shoes. She chuckled. Why was she laughing? 

"Mate, it's not gonna change the fact that your not with her. Have you tried talking to her?" she said cooly.

"Yeah, even asked for a second chance but nope. She thinks I'm a aclocholic and a drug addict." I flinch. Maybe Lauren was right, maybe I was too into drinking and drugs. And I told her I was gonna change, but here I am at 3:08 in the morning, getting drunk off my ass. 

"Have you tried, I don't know, not doing all that shit?" she sighed. She was right too. I just needed to stop, all I had to do was stop. 

"I told her I was gonna but, I don't know." I traced my fingers over my cup. 

"Your not gonna get her back if you don't try.. but anyway I should get going. Heres my number if you ever need anything." she smiled and wrote down here number on a napkin, giving it to me and leaving. I sighed and called Ashton. I was too tipsy to drive home. As Ashton pulled up, I sat quietly in his car.

"Hey you alright?" he looked over at me and then back at the road. I nodded and didn't say anything. Until something clicked in my head that I've been dying to tell someone.

"Do you think maybe if I stopped with all these habits I would get Lauren back? Like if I just stopped completely and be more responisible." I said quietly. Ashton smiled a little and shrugged.

"Yeah I think so, but you need to talk to her about it." he said cooly. 

"I really love her, you know? And it sucks. Like that day in the mall. All I wanted to do was kiss her, god damn Ashton. She looked so beautiful. So fucking beautiful she made my heart thump out of my chest. And I can't tell you how much I miss her. How much I miss calling her late at night." I sighed, tears filling my eyes. 

"Just to ask her how her day was." I began talking again.

"And now shes gone, and even if I stop doing all these bad things I don't think she'll come back. Does she even love me Ashton?" my hands were shaking. The alchohol really got to me. Ashton gave me a sad smile.

"Of course she loves you, she just hates what you do." he sighed and pulled into the driveway. I closed my eyes and ran my fingers through my hair. 

"Thanks for driving me." I mumbled and stepped out of the car, shutting the door. He locked his car and walked me upstairs. 

"Goodnight kiddo." he smiled before handing me a glass of water and shutting my door. I sighed and stripped dow into my boxers and jumped into bed. I pulled out my phone and called Lauren. Don't even ask me why I was calling her.

"Hello?" she said quietly. 

"Hey." I said, I wouldn't be suprised if she heard the sound of my heartbeat right now.

"Why are you calling at" she paused for a second and started talking again. "3:49 in the morning." she sighed. I smiled.

"I miss you." I said honestly, because I really did miss her. Her breathing got heavy.

"Your drunk." she sighed and I frowned.

"I'm drunk yea, but I still miss you." I played with my fingers. Hearing her voice was like heaven.

"Goodnight Calum." she giggled. That's all I needed.

"Stay. Please just stay and talk to me." I sighed and so did she.

"I'm tired and its almost 4 in the morning. I'll call you in the morning." her voice sounded so sleepy. I honestly couldn't help but smile.

"Fine." I pouted as if she could see me, god I wish she could see me. 

"Goodnight Calum." she giggled again and I grinned.

"Goodnight beautiful. I love you." before I could even take it back she replied,

"I love you too." 

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I HATE MYSELF BYE