Falling For Freddie (Freddie Mercury or Queen Fanfic)

t h i r t y - e i g h t

When Freddie and Alice met, it was ordinary, it felt ordinary. To him, she was another fan who was excited to meet him. It was a meeting that would have been forgotten if it was any other girl but her. When they met she had just finished her dancing rehearsal, wearing her crop top and pants, sweat accumulating by her hairline. But as his eyes met her brown almond eyes and her milky white skin, Freddie knew she was different, she was genuine, she was pure innocence. The kind of pureness you want to ruin but you know deep down inside, she'd deserve someone better than old grimy him who was riddled with scars from past relationships. Whenever he was high on her love during their relationship, that small voice inside of him would chant how this was all temporary, that she would end up like all the other people he had dated.

            Throughout their relationship, as he was older than her, he would teach her things that were new to her. He'd give her random piano lessons, teach her how to compose lyrics and new tricks in bed. They had their ups and downs, but barely a year in, it seemed as though they'd always known each other. He learned new things from her as well, she once taught him how to salsa dance and do the Charleston, random Korean sentences and introduced his palette to Korean dishes. They'd spend the weekend doing nothing, spending hours together talking about their dreams, their future together – his of touring around the world, hers of dancing with The Rockettes. Freddie was never one to rest on his laurels, but Alice is the only person worthy for him to take time off music and just to focus on her, on them.

            But when she left him, abruptly that Wednesday, she took a piece of him with her. The baby, their nugget. Freddie ran his hands through his stubble and checked his watch, it was twelve in the afternoon, almost a week since Alice left. He got up and walked to the front of Garden Lodge, Brian's Mustang had just arrived. Brian insisted for Freddie to come into the studio the day after Alice left to work rather than slugging in Garden Lodge where everything reminded him of Alice.

            "I've been watching you Fred, you have been working all day and night, stopping to either smoke cigarette, drink alcohol and sleep. People do that for three reasons, either they are crazy, in deep shit or they are trying to forget." Freddie thought about what Brian had said, of course he was right. Freddie would only come back to Garden Lodge to sleep and shower, hoping Alice would come back when he was around but to him, Garden Lodge was haunted.

It was haunted by the ghost of her, of what they had, the memories were plastered on each room. He would saw an image of her at the Koi pond, every time he walked by. She would be standing there, her black hair softly touching her skin, her almond eyes blinking softly as she feed the fishes. When he played the piano, he could see her seating next to him, hands wrapped around his waist, her chin rested to his shoulder, begging and puckering her lips for a kiss as he tried to compose a song. He could not eat at the dining table, all he saw was an apparition of Alice seating opposite of him, her feet rested to his thigh as she wrote cheekily on her notebook.

            Unfortunately, he felt the same when he went to the Wessex Sounds Studio, they had many memories there, even the couch in the lounge. Everywhere he looked, he saw her, saw things that brought her back to life. Freddie had lived in Garden Lodge, for longer than when he dated Alice, and yet all he could remember was the time they had together. Other memories were pieces of puzzle that did not evoke any feelings.

            Moments in Freddie noticed Brian was driving both of them on the freeway, it was not the same route to Wessex Studios. The car was heading down south.

            "Brian, where are we going?" Freddie asked, trying to process what was happening.

            "I'm driving you to Brighton," Brian answered. He caught Freddie looking down, defeated. He added, "Just talk to her Freddie." Freddie stayed silent, keeping the window rolled down, hoping the fresh air would help clear his mind, trying to piece the words of what he would say to Alice.

            He was mentally tired, he wondered if he would be able to say anything to Alice. What if she seemed happier there in Brighton, without him. Brian played The Beatles throughout the car ride and they barely spoke to each other. That was Brian, the friend who cared for Freddie, he was like his own brother.

            An hour in they had reached the city, Brian took out the wrinkled sheet of paper with Emma's address. It was a quarter to six in the evening, the traffic was light and the people were going about their daily business. Brian made another turn and Freddie caught a young woman in an oversized blouse paired with skinny jeans, holding groceries at the corner of the street, waiting to cross. His heart beat faster thinking it could be Alice, something about the way she stood, her posture reminded him of Alice. But alas, it was not her.

            "We're here Freddie," Brian announced, turning the key and his Mustang engine stopped promptly. Freddie looked up from the car window, the address of the house was imprinted on his brain, Emma's loft was situated on the fourth floor. Birds chirped on a nearby tree, the sky was a hue of orange and the sun was setting. It was the kind of atmosphere that he would have wanted to spend with Alice, and as he was thinking of her, he looked up to the balcony. 

            His legs felt weak as he stepped out of the car. He paused and glanced to Brian who was beside him now, putting his arms around Freddie with a reassuring look. Freddie realized he still wasn't sure what he was going to say to her.

            "Let's go!" Brian encouraged, patting him on the neck.