Solangelo Oneshots

Vaffancullo

AN//Italics are in Italian.

"Kayla Knowles if you don't get back here, I swear, I will very slowly and painfully kill you!" Nico yelled. All Will could understand were the words, 'kill you,' but he supposed the beginning of the sentence could be 'My dear friend, I would never,' in which case everything would be fine. Unfortunately, he very much doubted this was the case.

-A few moments earlier-
"Oh gods, I love this game!" Austin said as he watched Will act out 'The Bee Movie.'
"Oh, human, I love you. Ya like jazz?" Will said.
"Charades isn't as hard when you can use words." Percy said happily.
"It's easier, but it defeats the entire purpose of the game." Annabeth pointed out.
"Yet none of you have guessed it." Kayla said. "The Bee Movie. A cinematic masterpiece." Will got down from the Poseidon cabin's stage. No one was really sure why the Poseidon cabin had a stage in it, but no one was complaining. It was nice for impromptu charades nights. "Okay, Kayla. You got that one, so you go next." Will sat on the ground next to Nico. Neither of them knew what was about to happen.

Kayla walked up onto the stage. "Okay, so I'm gonna do one not in the bowl," she said, adjusting her stance for whatever she was about to act out. "I'm so emo." Everyone immediately looked at Nico, who was scowling. "Tag yourself, I'm the corn plant! Will could pin me up against anything with those arms. You're not my type. So anger. Much edgy. Death metal rules!"
"Are....you trying to be Nico?" Percy asked, visibly upset at her interpretation of their friend.
"Duh." Kayla said. Nico stood up and looked around. "Is that how you guys see me?" Kayla just stood there, looking at him. "Do you not see yourself that way?" Nico's eye twitched. Kayla saw this and ran.

"Kayla Knowles, I swear, if you don't get back here right now I will kill you, resurrect you, then kill you again!" Nico shouted.
"Oh dang." Annabeth, who apparently understood Italian, said. "That's not good." Nico took off running after Kayla.
"Hmm. So anger." Will sighed, grabbing his first aid kit and trudging after his boyfriend.

Will stared at the harsh artificial light of his computer screen. He was trying to learn Italian so he could understand Nico when he was angry. However, it was not going very well. Reading English was hard enough, add another non-ancient Greek language to the mix, and it just gets worse. "Why would I need to know how to say 'newspaper?' Phones exist!" And yeah, he supposed most demigods didn't have phones, but the computer software didn't know that. "Why is everything gendered?" He screamed into the night sky. Then he realized that was just about the worst thing he could've done in this situation. Harpies swooped down as Will ran frantically to the nearest cabin. "Will?" Will turned around nervously to look at his friend. "Oh. Lou Ellen, I didn't realize this was your cabin." She gave him a blank look. "You just ran into a random cabin?" "I was being chased by harpies, Lou. You would've done the same thing." "Why were you outside this late? Don't you have a cabin to manage?" Will rolled his eyes. "I'm trying to learn Italian for Nico. I like knowing what he's saying when he's mad."
"And how's that working out for ya?" "I think you know the answer." Lou nodded and gestured for Will to come to the back of her cabin.
"Woah." Will said upon seeing the rest of the cabin. "How is this cabin so big?"
"Magic." Lou said simply. "Here." She handed him a small device. It looked like a smartphone. "This will translate whatever he says into English, no matter what language. Italian, French, ASL.....  It'll appear on the screen. And it doesn't attract monsters, so that's good." "Why don't you sell this? You could make millions." Lou rolled her eyes. "Art isn't about the money. Also, it doesn't work for mortals. I don't know why, and I don't care. Now," She said, pushing Will out of her cabin, "Let me get some sleep."

"Sto per tagliarti la testa." Will heard his boyfriend murmur in his sleep. It had been about a week since Lou had given him the device, but he hadn't used it yet. Don't get him wrong, he definitely wanted to, Will just never had it on him when he needed it. But now was this chance. "What'd you say?" Will whispered. Nico muttered some words as Will watched the message appear on the screen. 'I'm going to chop your head off.'

Will was still bewildered by his boyfriend's sleep talking the next morning at breakfast. Since he wasn't allowed to spend the night in Nico's cabin, he couldn't express his concerns to his siblings, or they would know he broke the rules. Maybe he could ask Nico?

"Nico."
Nico looked up from his waffles. "Yeah?"
"So, um, I know we're demigods, so I mean, I guess it wasn't that weird I guess but I— anyway, last night you sleep-talked. You said, um, that you were going to chop someone's head off." Nico didn't respond, he just started laughing. "What's so funny?" Will asked. Nico took another bite of his waffle. "I knew you were listening. Lou Ellen told me." "That scoundrel!" "Yeah. And so I spent hours coming up with the creepiest thing to say. Was it as hilarious as I thought it would be?"
"This is why I have trust issues." Will paused. "Worth it."