Solangelo Oneshots

The Job

Will was going to be blunt here. He didn't like the new guy. He didn't like him one bit. He thought he was so cool with his accounting job and his luscious black hair and his slight Italian accent. Everyone was charmed by him. Everyone, that is, except Will. Will saw past his act. Will knew that Nico had stolen the last donut yesterday. Will had been waiting all morning to get out of a meeting so he could grab the pink donut with sprinkles. When he finally was able to leave the meeting, the donut was gone. And there Nico was, sitting at his desk, eating the donut.

When Will had confronted him about it, Nico didn't even look up from his computer. "Those donuts were for everyone," He said, "It's not my fault that you were too slow and didn't get one."

The next day was even worse. Will came in to find his keyboard covered in plastic wrap, and he knew exactly who did it. He could see Nico sitting at his desk, typing innocently. He could see the way Nico was looking at him. He could see the smile on Nico's face. A smile that said 'I covered your keyboard in plastic wrap.'

On Saturday, Will was getting a cheeseburger. Cheeseburgers were his guilty pleasure. He was sitting outside the fast food place, eating his cheeseburger, when he looked across the street and saw his coworker. He was reading a book on a bench, listening to music through headphones.

That was the day Will decided. He was the gay of this office. Will finished his cheeseburger and drove home. He sat at his desk and began composing a plan. He would drive Nico to quit. Will was the supreme gay, and no one would would take that from him.

"Hey, Di Angelo. I made some brownies. Want one?" Will asked during lunch.
"Why are you calling me Di Angelo? Are you mad?" Nico asked.
"Take the fucking brownie, man." Will insisted.
"I just found out yesterday that I'm allergic to gluten. It's a bummer." Nico replied, picking up his gluten free pasta and hurrying away from Will. "Bye, Will. Gotta go crunch numbers."

Will washed the paint off his brushes. He had just made Nico the most grotesque painting he could think to paint. The painting was of a wolf made of moldy cheese. He would give it to him tomorrow.

"Oh, wow! Thanks, Will. How did you know?"
Will was dumbfounded. "What?"
"How did you know that I love wolves? And that I love cheese? And the mold adds a nice pop of color. Thank you so much, Will. You're the best."

Will sat in bed, plotting. Maybe if he made gluten free brownies and filled them with cocaine? No! Will thought. Bad Will! That's illegal. Bad! Where would I even find cocaine? I could fill his desk with liverwurst. Oh! I've got it. I'll wrap his keyboard in plastic wrap. Give him a taste of his own medicine.

The next day, Will got to work early. He wrapped Nico's keyboard in plastic wrap and waited. Nico came in about half an hour later. He was holding coffee and talking to one of their coworkers absentmindedly. Will watched him walk to his desk, then looked away, waiting to hear the reaction.

"Thank goodness this plastic wrap is here." Nico said. Will's head snapped in his direction.
"What?!" Will asked.
"Yeah," Nico explained, "I spilled coffee on my keyboard. It would have been ruined if you hadn't wrapped it in plastic."
Will blushed and stammered. "I didn't— what makes you think— argh!" Will threw his hands to his head. He didn't notice Nico's smug smile as he walked away.

Will didn't get any work done that day. He just kept glancing over at his enemy. Nico sat there all day, except for when he got up to use the bathroom. This gave Will an idea.

Will got to work early again. He went into the bathrooms and taped pictures of Mr. Bean to the toilet lids, so when Nico picked it up, he would be greeted by the seductive face of Mr. Bean.

What Will failed to account for was that he worked in an office with a ton of people. Nico was not the first one to use the bathroom, and therefore it was not him who found the Mr. Bean.

What else could Will do? He sat at his desk and stroked his chin. Oh! Will thought, I know! I'll cover his desk with sticky notes. That'll show him!

Will woke up even earlier this time. He rolled out of bed onto the floor and forced himself to get dressed. He went outside. It was still dark out. He went to the store and bought a ton of sticky notes.

When Will got to work, he was met with a surprise. Nico was sitting at his desk, holding two fancy coffees. "Hey, Will."
"What's going on?" Will asked, very disoriented.
"You've been flirting with me for the last week and I know you were never going do ask me out, so I decided to take matters into my own hands. What's with all the post-its?"
"I, um, I was going to cover your desk in sticky notes. What do you mean, flirting with you?"

Nico looked at him weird. "You covered my keyboard with plastic? You taped Mr. Bean on the toilets to scare me? Were you not flirting?"

Will thought back. He could see where his pranks could have been seen as flirting. But did he like Nico? Like, like like? Will thought about it.
"Holy crap." He said. "I like you."

Nico smiled. "I like you, too."