Rebellion

Crossing The Line

Teruo came soon. She felt weird once she noticed him. It has been so long since she was alone with him. Like a life time passed by since they did this. It was such a different time then, he changed too. Of course, not as drastically as her, but she did notice changes. He got taller, barely two centimeters but she still noticed. And even his shoulders were broader. She never did pay attention, but after half a year of not really paying attention to him, she noticed him getting manlier. 

She didn't know how to talk to him. She knew what was the plan, but adopting him was something she couldn't do. Ayase had more things to do than taking care of him and paying for his food. While she felt bad for it, she just couldn't do it, even if she knew Naoki wanted it. She wanted many things too, yet she never got them. Why would he? 

He was quiet, sitting next to her. Ayase caught him taking glimpses at her with his light green eyes. He'd look away whenever she'd look at him back. His gaze looked oddly sad.This was exactly what she was scared of. This awkwardness. She didn't even know how to act since she called him out by his real name. Was he mad? Was he embarrassed? 

She shook her head. No reason to be so considerate. His care wasn't anything genuine. It was just Naoki's command to keep her safe. If he didn't order Teruo to take care of her, he would've raped her along with the other men. He didn't care. She shouldn't be careful with his feelings. 

"Daremo-" She tried, but he cut her off.

"No. Don't." Teruo cut her off.

She was left speechless. Why didn't he want to be called by his actual name? He was obsessed with finding his past before. She risked her life for him, got raped and beaten. Why is he rejecting it? Does he even know it was because of him?

"Why not?" Ayase asked, getting angry. 

"I don't need that childhood. It's better if I forgot it." He mumbled under his breath. 

She noticed even his voice got a bit deeper. But she couldn't focus on that, not while she was getting angry.

"I tried so hard to find your past! We got fucked up because of it!" Ayase got up, marching to him.

"I didn't mean it in that w-" He tried, but she punched him. 

He looked surprised, holding his cheek. She was surprisingly strong. It's not that it hurt him a lot, but to think he was capable of that surprised him. What happened to her? Why did he have to be so weak about his past? Nothing like this would have happened if he was just quiet about this. She would've been fine, she wouldn't have gotten hurt. 

"I wasted so much time on finding that! You know what I got in return?!" She screamed as she yelled.

He tried to say something, but she got angry again and hit him again. He felt tears in his eyes. It didn't even hurt physically, it just hurt emotionally. He never thought she'd be the one to hurt him this way. Everyone could hurt him and beat him, but not Ayase. 

"I got raped and beaten!" She yelled even louder, hitting him harder. 

The hit got him to fall from his seat to the floor. His eyes were wide. He tried so hard to protect her, everyone did. He had so many feelings for her. She was the first one to give him warmness. It was all gone now. He just loved her. He still did. But it just hurt. Naoki died protecting her, promising to adopt him. It was all too good to be true. It was like a prank. Like he'd actually have a childhood. Like he'd actually be free from the gang life. Like he'd actually be happy. Such stupid ideas and he was enough of an idiot to fall for them. That's what he gets for fucking up her life. 

He got kicked one more time. This time she stopped. But it looked like she wouldn't stop if the doorbell hadn't rang. Ayase went to open the door, leaving the boy alone. She got surprised when she saw who was on the door. Her so called best friend, Satoko.

"What do you want?" Ayase asked, her voice obviously irritated and angry.

"I know I'm gonna regret this, but I wanna try to talk to you one last time." Satoko told Ayase, her face serious. 

"We have nothing to talk about, Satoko. Go home." Ayase tried to close the door on her, but Satoko opened the door forcefully.

Satoko's face was surprised as she looked behind Ayase. She pushed Ayase to the side, getting her out of the way. Ayase looked at Satoko with a confused face, not understanding her reaction but she did get furious at her violent push. Then she remembered exactly why Satoko reacted like that.

Satoko knelt down next to Teruo, looking at him with a worried face. His face was bleeding a bit, his eyes watery from the tears. She didn't understand what happened here, but it looked bad, and she was sure he didn't deserve it. Especially since he was crying so hard, whispering how he deserved all of this.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" Satoko yelled at her, looking away from Teruo.

Ayase felt a rush of guilt after noticing what exactly she did, after all the anger went away. What did she become? She was acting so paranoid and angry, like she was scared of the world. But she was right to do so. It was always against her. Nobody was ever by her side. The world was just punishing her. The whole world was against her, so she should return the favor. Her guilt didn't stop, but she convinced herself to ignore it. She was not the one who should show it.

"Nothing! You guys deserve this!" She answered, her voice aggressive. 

"No, you deserve this! Fuck even trying to talk to you!" Satoko yelled, giving a helping hand to Teruo.

Ayase felt hurt by her words. She didn't know what to say. She had to fight back against the world, even if it was by hurting it. She had to be strong and prove it.

"You deserve everything my dad ever did to you!" Ayase yelled the first thing that came into her mind. 

Satoko, who was giving Teruo a shoulder to help him walk, stopped in her tracks. Ayase didn't see her expression, but she guessed she was hurt. Ayase was shaking, trying to not explode in tears and apologize. She didn't want to lose her best friend. But she had to get her away. She didn't need her anymore. So many thoughts were rushing to her head. Sadness, anger, guilt and fear. What happened to her life?

"Leave me and Shiro from your stupid fucking gang. I quit being by your side." Satoko said, not even looking at her former best friend.

"Let's see how that goes! Try not coming to one meeting, you'll fucking die! I'll kill off you and your stupid boyfriend!" Ayase yelled, her voice cracking and her tears threatening to fall.

She watched her leaving with Teruo. She didn't even know who's sobs were heard, hers or Teruos. As soon as they got farther away, she knew it was hers. She just cried, begging Satoko doesn't leave in her head. She hoped she'd stay and understand. Stay no matter how bad Ayase's words came. But she didn't come back, never again. She was no longer her best friend, and her leaving just like that was to Ayase a very bad betrayal. No matter how much she knew she was in the wrong, she kept treating herself as the victim. It'll make her job easier.