Tuning Heartstrings

Chapter 5

(Written July 30, 2014)

In the living room, I take out my phone and call 911. A deep, monotone voice answers on the other end. "911, what is your emergency?"

After a few moments of awkward silence, my dry throat musters the courage to speak. I explain how I woke up from a sudden, loud noise and found the bodies of my parents. He asks if I checked their pulses, if there were signs of break-ins or if anyone else is home. He then asks what I think happened, and I connect the dots by realizing that my father must have found my mother's body after she killed herself by consuming pills and, unable to take the pain, flipped the couch in anger and ended his own life with a kitchen knife.

The man orders me to stay put as police officers and an ambulance are on their way. I agree. With tears falling down my cheeks, I go and hug my dad one last time.

"Goodbye, Dad. I will always love you."

I then go over to my mom.

"Mom, you tried to be the best mother, and you were, despite everything. I love you and will miss you."

I walk outside the house and sit on the lawn with my bag, waiting for the cops to arrive. I cry harder as I realize that I will never return to this house.

Once the cops arrive, l give my statement and am informed that I cannot return during the coroner's investigation. I'm also told that I'll get a call when the autopsies are confirmed. I nod robotically to all the information. A female officer pats my back and asks if I have family or friends I can stay with. I lie and say my friend lives nearby. After they bombard me with more information, I'm allowed to leave.

One of the officers offers a ride, but I say l'd rather walk and get some fresh air. As I step off the lawn, I look at the house one last time and begin to walk away.

As I walk through the streets, I try to stop myself from crying and decide that this is the start of a fresh new life. I got laid off at the Starbucks I was working at a few weeks ago and only have my high school diploma, but it's not the end of the world. It can't be, right?

I check my phone. It's 3:12 am.

At this point, my body is exhausted and feels as if I have not slept for days. After walking down multiple blocks, I reach Davidson Park which is surrounded by apartment complexes and consists of a water park, playground, baseball field, and skatepark. I have no friends and no family, so the best place to rest seems to be a random, secluded park bench. I find a bench under a couple of trees near the skatepark and decide it is the best I'll find. I place my backpack on the bench to use as a pillow and lie down.

The bench is cold, and as it touches my leg, I feel a shiver down my spine. But after a minute, the bench warms up to my skin. As my eyelids become heavy with sleep, I feel as if I am about to drift away, but something stops me.

There's a figure in the distance, walking towards me.