You're Perfect (A Big Time Rush Fanfic)

Chapter 23

Oliver had in fact been sick for awhile and I hadn't even noticed. He had a fatal feline disease that meant fluid was in his lungs causing trouble breathing. The vet advised we put him to sleep as soon as possible because he was in so much pain. I decided that day so I could get it over with. I had my goodbyes with him and didn't cry. I didn't want to, because Oliver had lived a long happy, very spoiled, life and he was old. He was suffering so I knew he would be in a better place for sure. James was the one who actually got teary eyed at the moment Oliver was put to sleep. We walked out of the vet cat less and holding an empty carrier.

James was overly sweet to me in case I broke down on him or something. I was actually fine. James however made me coffee, tea, and brought me food in the living room as if I was going to burst into tears and needed a pick me up.

"James, sweetheart, I'm fine." I told him. He sighed.

"I know you are, or at least you think you are." He said then he took a breath. "I think I'm going to give Oliver's tree to Alexa and Carlos for their cats." James told me leaning back on the couch. I smiled.

"That's okay, they can enjoy it." I told him. He gave me a look of confusion.

"Are you always this way in times of grief?" James asked. I shrugged.

"Mostly." I confirmed.

"Well, that makes a lot of sense. You're strong so I feel like you can't cry over Oliver." James said. I glared at him.

"What are you trying to say?" I asked him. He shook his head.

"Nothing, you don't want to be sad so you tell yourself, he's better off. That's right, he's pain free." James said looking at the ceiling. I rolled my eyes smiling. I crawled over to him and lied on his chest.

"You were really sweet buying him that thing." I told James. He rubbed my shoulder as I rested my chin on his chest.

"I just wanted to make him happy because I knew he made you happy." James said drawing hearts on my shoulder. I smiled and sighed.

"How did I get so lucky to stumble upon you?" I asked him. James chuckled.

"More like, I thank God every day for making me get stuck in traffic and making me late to Carlos's party and driving up that driveway behind you." James said tracing the bottom of my shoulder tattoo that peeked out from under my tshirts sleeve.

"What are your tattoos? Do they mean anything?" James asked lifting us both up and lifting up my right sleeve. I hid my face by looking at my shoulder. I didn't know how James felt about my tattoos so I was nervous.

"Well, this one is just a simple three piece rose tattoo. It has three roses because well, things look better in odd numbers. It's not really a sentimental piece, it just spoke to me and was really beautiful with the water droplets falling off their petals and thorns." I told him. James ran his hand across the tattoo and smirked.

"They are really beautiful. What about this one?"James asked me about the next one on my left shoulder.

"Uh, this one is a girl tattooed in black and white looking into a mirror to see her own reflection in color. She is wearing a yellow flower in her hair and I feel like I am her. I may be living in a black and white world with judgment and hate towards me, but as long as I see color, or beauty in myself, that's all that matters." I explained to James. He smiled mesmerized by touching my tattoo.

"This is my favorite so far." He said. I smiled and giggled. "How may do you have? You had three before those six long months." James said. I nodded and flipped my hair out of the way.

"Pull the back of my shirt down." I told him.

"Holy shit." James said as he did. I laughed. "You have like a complete scene tattooed on your back." James said touching my back making me shiver. He laughed.