13 reasons Why Not

Chapter 23 - Clay

I can still hear her voice...

It haunts me... her words... Clay's mom...!

Hannah... you done this...!

She didn't say that... she didn't need to... I know I did it... why didn't i stop him leaving??

The drive to the hospital, it was the worst of my life... at least when I hurt myself I didn't know what was going on...

All I could think about was Clay... not who done it... not how I felt... just him... helmet...

My mom continually looking over at me... trying to reassure me that he will be fine, "He will probably be wake when we get there..."

I was praying she was right...

I felt numb... my adrenaline was running over time... like something was rushing through my body.

We arrived at the hospital... I usually hate these places, today was different... I just needed to see Clay... see if he was ok...

Clay's mom didn't say what happened... all she said was he was attacked... he's in hospital... unconscious... I hoped with every part of me he had woken up.

Walking into the ward my stomach was in knots... I rushed through the halls...

"Where's Clay Jensen? I need to see Clay!!"

The nurse behind the desk searched the computer... she looked up at my teary eyes...

"Hannah..."

A voice came from behind me... it was Clay's mom...

As soon as I looked at her I could see the pain in her eyes... tears running down her face... I couldn't stop it, no matter how hard I tried... I burst into tears.

Clay's mom held me... I wrapped my arms around her... i needed to be near Clay.

Through my tears I managed to muster a few words...

"Where is He? Clay... Is he ok....? I need to see him!!"

"Hannah... you can't honey... he's in theatre..."

My heart broke... I was praying so much that he would be awake... that he had a bump on his head... stitches at the worst...

The three of us sat in the waiting room... Clay's dad was working away... he was on his way back.

Clays mom began telling us what she knew...

I wanted to throw up... someone hit him... across the head with sonething...I started crying again.

My feelings went from bad to worse at this point... every part of me was praying... praying he would be ok, praying I would speak to him again... praying I would get to tell him I love him....

Please give us a second chance... let us live the second chance that Clay helped me find... let me love him...

After time my tears subsided... for now. I just felt sick... sat in silence...

After what felt like forever a doctor walked in...

"Mrs Jensen?"

The doctor introduced himself... my hands were shaking

"Do you want to come through...?"

Clay's mom got up... she looked over at me...

"Hannah... are you coming...?" I could see how upset she was... I wanted to be there for her, like she is for me