everything I didn't say

twenty seven

"I don't think any of you have truly written to your absolute full potential yet." Professor Small walks back in for in front of his students. "Don't get me wrong, some of you are doing phenomonal. Others, average. Some, bitterly awful." He cups his hands together.

"I've noticed over the years one topic that always has different viewpoints and always get people writing creatively and critically. What topic would that be?"

"Religion." Someone shouts. "Homosexuality." Shouts another.

"Politics?" Someone guesses. "Illegal drugs." Comes from right beside me.

"You're all terribly wrong, I'm afraid." He shakes his head, and waves his hands. "More!"

"Underage drinking." I hear. "College." Behind me.

"No." Small says again. Love, I think. It has to be about love.

"Relationships?"

"We're getting closer. Almost there!" He shouts.

"Love." I finally say. Professor Small just smiles at me.

"Of course it's love. Everyone between ages thirteen and twenty two all have admitted to falling in love already. When nobody has a full and practical version of what love is, you all just seem to highly enjoy writing your idea of it."

This ought to be good.

"So write about it. Write about your experience with it, what you think about it. Write if you think it doesn't exist, tell me why. Tell me why it's easier to fall in love with a celebrity than with your soulmate. Tell me what you want about love. And tell it to me by Friday. Dismissed." He says and everyone stands from their seats, leaving the classroom.

-

--

"So, what'd you get today?" Niall asks when I walk into my bedroom, he was sitting cross legged on my bed, reading a copy of Harry Potter I let him borrow.

He sets the book down as I hand him my notebook. At the top of the page I wrote Love, and and the instructions for the passage he wants us to write.

"You would have a field day with mine if I wrote it." He hands it back. "New assignment, by the way. Last year we had to specifically write about love at first sight, not just anything we want on the topic of the emotion."

"What'd you write?"

"I literally wrote, and I quote: 'Love at first sight exists, but it pays to take a second look'."

"Oh god," I fake cringe and laugh when he swats my arm, "everyone uses that. I was almost inspired by your originality, you had me fooled." I laugh some more.

"I didn't care at this point in the semester, it was when I started smoking. I basically turned in this kind of shit up until my expulsion." He frowns.

"Were you majoring in English or writing?" I ask.

"I was. I had two english classes, and I flunked them both so badly, Garden Grove wouldn't even let me keep my english major. I had to switch, hence sound engineering."

I nod in understandment.

"God, Leah." He leans back on the pillow. "If only I had known you then. I wouldn't have done all the stupid shit I did."

"But we didn't, and you did that stuff. Shouldn't waste time thinking about it now."

"Why can't I think like you?" He rests his hand on the side of my cheek. "You always know what to fucking say. God, I say fucking way too fucking much." He cringes.