Double Down (a double standards series) Dark Romance (Part 7)

Yes Means No, No Means Yes

What did I just agree to? I can't marry him, I can't marry into this family. Such a dirty trick he used to gain my yes.

Do I love him, more than I thought possible but marriage? Shit, we barely get along. We've only known each other for maybe eight months and the majority of that time was spent running from him or arguing.

Currently I stood before him glaring up into his laughing eye's. Yes, I just popped his jaw but it was well deserved after letting me dangle overboard by a string and telling me horror stories of death by sea. Striking my hand out again full of anger he caught it before I could connect with his skin. "You dirty bastard. You was going to let me die. If I hadn't of said yes I'd be dead right now".

Laughing he shook his head. "As I recall you threw yourself overboard and I saved you. Even had you not agreed I would have still pulled you up before you fell".

Balling my fists up by my side I seethed. "Well I take it back now. I'd never marry you".

" Tsk, tsk, tsk... My Angel. You can't go back on your word now. We will be wed within the month even if you recite your vows at gunpoint. Don't test me anymore tonight wifey. My main goal is getting us off this boat undetected". He said with a warning in his tone.

Lifting me up, he placed me in the life boat and shoved it aside. Climbing in himself, he used the pulley to lower us to the water. Soon we were engulfed into the black night and silence surrounded us. I sat smugly as CJ rowed us toward land. Stewing alone on the inside was killing me and I wanted him to feel my wrath. I didn't care about his earlier warning, I was going to continue my rant. "You would have to be crazy to want to marry me."

"Well crazy I am". Was the only answered he provided.

" yes you are. You and your family, raging lunatics. I refuse to be your wife. Think about it CJ. We've only dated a short time and most the time we are fighting. What makes you think marriage would work for us? "

"You're perfect for me Alice and I for you. You may not believe that but I do".

"What, did your dead grandparents tell you that too". I spat sarcastically and instantly regretted it.

CJ once told me that he believed his deceased grandparents sent him signs. As crazy as that sounds I had no right to belittle him for it. Everyone copes with loss differently. Storm clouds brewed in his eye's and I knew I had reached my limits. "I'm sorry". I offered.

In a fit of rage CJ released the oars and flew toward me. The weight of his body pushed me down to the wooden planks of the boat floor. Gripping my jaws between his fingers he squeezed much like a mother would do a child. "Listen here Alice. You will marry me. You will have my last name and honor it with pride. You will carry my heirs and you will be my queen. You can make this hard on yourself or you can bask in my love. My promise to you is to keep you safe. Whatever you want it's yours. I can make you a happy wife. Stop denying me".

He finally released my jaws and sat up. I too sat up and swiped a few lone tears from my eye's. "You just don't get it CJ. I love you, I do but it isn't wise to rush into a marriage especially considering our past. It would be doomed. Besides I don't want your fucking money or protection or gifts. I want your love, respect, honesty and time. Please CJ, all I'm asking is give us time to build a solid relationship, normal relationship. I want dates, flowers, good morning texts. I want it to be normal. Please don't force this upon me".

CJ sat quietly I'm hoping thinking my word's over and seeing how right I am. "I'm sorry if I hurt you". He murmured and continued his rowing.

Soon I was aboard the family jet heading back to New York City. CJ sat across the isle from me pretending to be asleep to avoid further conversation. I think he knew I spoke the truth and was fighting within himself. I do believe he will see thing's my way in the end. If he forced me into wedlock I'd grow to hate him and we would both want out due to misery. As bad as that sounds another part of me wants to be in his arm's right now. I'm not sure if it's because of my love for him or my lack of male intimacy. Reminders of how he made my body feel filtered through my mind and my center begin to heat up. I knew sleeping with him right now would be dangerous but my hormones won out. I needed his touch, it been far too long.