To Be His (Completed)

15

Baffled by his words, I watch the closed lift doors as I'm stunned in place. Guilt, disgust, and, most importantly, pain coursed through me as I realise the hastiness of our actions. Of my actions. Why did I allow him what I didn't allow anyone else? Why must I feel like shite after leaving his side every time?

I take a step back and realisation strikes. Then another pang of guilt hits. And another, until I reach my desk. I hastily grab my belongings and put my hair in a bun. Before I know it, I'm exiting the lift at ground level and headed towards the tube. I know they aren't open, but maybe someone will be kind enough. Frustration pours through me, as I begin to question everything about myself. Like why the bloody hell couldn't I fight my lust towards him and how stupid I am.

I pay no mind to the time nor rain and continue walking down the vacant roads. I'm just thankful that it's not pouring like it was yesterday morning. Instead, it's a mild downcast that's sticking my hair to my face. Almost as if God heard my cries, an estate pulls up next to me. A blonde fellow rolls down his window and leans towards me. "Need a lift mate?" I look in front of me to check the road and notice I have a good walk before reaching my house or the tube.

I turn back to the stranger and nod my head vigorously. I go around and enter his estate. When I entered and closed the door, I thanked him. "Where to?" "225A Chiswick High Road, please," I say and he nods his head at me. He starts the engine and I sit back slightly. "Funny thing, I'm headed there myself." I give him an odd look when he faces me with a grin on his face.

"Yeah. You see, I'm supposed to give this girl a lift, but luckily, she came to me," he responds in a chilling tone and I freeze. Seconds pass, and he maintains his grin before laughing like a fool. He hits the wheel before facing me again. "Oh, your face. It was a priceless mate. You were like ahhh!" he tells me as he mimics my reaction and I watch as my body release the tension.

"If only," he laughs to himself before calming down. "Name's Kyle. Kyle Jackson." It's only now that I notice his American accent and look at him oddly. His name sounds familiar. "What's your name?" I look at him for a minute and debate whether responding. Hesitantly, I say, "Vanessa Bane." "Pleasure to meet you, love," Kyle says and I nod.

"Mind any music?" he asks politely and I shake my head. "Wonderful," he says to himself more than to me, and music pours out from the speakers. I recognize the song from a film I watched a while back ago, and let the music feel my emotions for me. Eminem never fails me when it comes to songs expressing pure emotions.

Feeling my eyes flutter out of weariness, I let myself rest. I lean my head into the seat and let the music cloak me like a wool blanket. Sleep welcomes me with open arms, and before long, I've fallen asleep in Kyle's estate.

"Vanessa," a voice coos at me. "Vanessa, babe," I hear the voice say once more and my eyes flutter open. "Liam?" I question when realising whom it is. "Yes love," he responds in a chuckle and adds, "You need to wake up or you'll miss our baby blow out his candles. It's his 7th year." I shot up out of bed, but feel myself fall back as a weight pulls me back down.

"Easy there love. We have to protect two of you now," he states as he helps lift me off of the sofa in our room. Slowly and gently, I stand in front of him and he smiles down at me before placing a kiss on my temple. "I can't wait till she's here." Liam looks down at my stomach and places a hand on my swollen stomach.

No. Not again. I'm not pregnant, yet I look rather pregnant. "Now come on. Let's go celebrate our baby's happy anniversary." Liam tells me as he takes my hand in his, and leads me to the sitting room. I notice a little boy with curly dark brown hair and beautiful brown eyes. He's surrounded by other children as they await the treat before him. When he lifts his gaze up from his candles, his gaze instantly meets mine.

His face beams with joy, compared to before, and he squeals, "Mummy! You're finally here." Shock hits me in the pit of my stomach and a slight fear spreads within. I'm not your mother. I can't be. I... I can't. I just can't. It's not possible for me to be pregnant. I'm not very fertile.

I watch as the little boy stretches out his hands towards me as he beckons me over and I stay still. Liam squats next to him before looking at me. "Come on love. It's his anniversary!" he says and my fear grows. "No. This is all wrong. I can't have children." I tell them and start to back away.

I notice my swollen stomach slowly decrease in size as the joy in their faces rapidly changes to confusion and worry. I look down and see the last of my belly, go away. A wave of a displeasure flows through me and stops at my fanny. Suddenly, the displeasure goes away, and blood starts to cloak the floor as it spills from my legs.

I look back at Liam in fear and notice he's as terrified as I am. Then, shortly after, my son calls after me. "Mummy!" he shouts after me with tears gliding down his face as he starts to dissipate into thin air. I watch as Liam tries to save him but fails. "NO!" I shout in agony. "Vanessa," Liam says chillingly, and I look over at him.

"Vanessa," he says again as he extends his hand towards me. We stare into each other's eyes, as the tears pour down my face. "No. Liam." I sob and watch as his hand is the first to turn to specks. Little by little, the rest of him is flaked away with an unknown wind. "Vanessa," is the last thing he says before flaking off.

I cry out the pain I feel and feel myself be surrounded by darkness. My figure slouched in defeat as all around me lays a darkness so pure and conflicting. "Vanessa." a voice calls out and I follow it. It becomes my guide out of this prison, I call my mind. Out of the shackles given to me by a ghost. Into the future, I go.

"Vanessa," Thomas calls as he shakes me slightly. "Morning sis. It's time to go inside." I nod my head at him and take his hand as I get out of the estate. I look back and sleepy thank Kyle. "Anytime. Good Night Vanessa." Kyle says and Thomas closes the door before he drives off.