Life with Demi Lovato

Chapter Three

Once I got home, I ran straight to mine and Kenzie's room but she wasn't there.

She must of gotten held back for the assignment she didn't do.

Two hours passed and I still hadn't seen Kenzie.

'Vanessa!' I called.

'What's up trouble-maker?' she winked.

Ever since she found out what Kenzie and I had been getting up to, she always calls me 'trouble maker'.

'Have you seen Kenzie? I haven't seen her since I got home'

Her face dropped and she started playing with her fingers.

'They didn't tell you?' She asked slowly

'What? Tell me what?' I said now panicking.

'Nat.. She.. Umm'

Was she dead? What hadn't I been told? Where the hell was my girlfriend?

'Spit it out! Tell me!' I could feel my anger and stress leaves rising.

'Her parents got back from their trip around Europe sooner than expected. They came and got her earlier today..'

'Oh ok' I said with a smile.

'You don't seem bothered by this at all..' She said confused.

'Why would I be? I'll still see her at school'

Again, Vanessa's face dropped.

'What?' I hesitantly asked scared about her response.

'Kenzie and her family are moving to live in Europe. They have a flight later tonight. She won't be at school tomorrow.. or ever'

I quietly turned around and walked back to my room. I went over to Kenzie's bed and laid on it and cried silently. It smelled like her.

Oh my god, this is pathetic. She's been gone for what? A few hours? And I already miss her like crazy. I missed her smile, her voice, her hugs.. For fuck sake, I just miss her!

And she left. She could have at least stuck around to say goodbye.

That's it, I'm through with love. Love is just fucking stupid.

Yeah sure, I'm 14. 'Too young to know what love is' Well guess what! I loved her. I loved her more than anything. She made me happy.

Why am I even writing all this sappy shit? This isn't me. Dammit. Why is this getting to me?

I got up off her bed and went back to mine. I put my headphones in and blasted non other than Demi Lovato. Every song of hers fixes any situation.

'Nat..' I heard Vanessa say quietly as she walked awkwardly into my room.

'What?' I snapped.

'We have someone coming. They're looking to adopt. Can you come out and join us in the dinning room?'

'What's the point?' I snapped

She gave me a sympathetic smile.

'Come on.. You never know. It could be your luck day'

Vanessa was starting to get on my nerves.

'Oh come off it! Who wants a fucked up 14 year old lesbian? They'll just pick another infant so no, no I won't come and join you!'

Sure, it was harsh but did I care?

Fuck no.

Vanessa sighed, 'Natalie, you're coming whether you like it or not. I'm not leaving you in here on your own'

'Fine then. Stay with me. See if I care' I snapped.

There was a silence and then I heard her sigh.

'Nat.. I'm really trying. Do you know how many conversations I've had about you? You're on your last straw kid. Please, please just come with me. You can bring your phone, keep your headphones in, do whatever. Just come. I'm worried about you'.

I smirked at her sappiness. She actually thinks I believe she cares?

Bull shit. No one cares.

'Fine. I need to use the bathroom so I'll be down in a second'

I went into the bathroom and got out my blade. One cut won't hurt, right?

Wrong.

It wasn't one cut. It wasn't two either. I don't even know how many there was. At least ten. They were deeper than normal and they bled a lot.

Maybe this time I've gone to far.

Maybe I'm finally going to die.

The thought of dying made me smile.

Finally, I was going to be dead.

'Nat, come on' I heard Vanessa say, pulling me out of my thoughts.

I wasn't in the mood to fight so I just cleaned up my wrist and followed her out of my room into the dinning room. I sat at the back of the room in the corner with my headphones in; still listening to Demi.

Everyone was so happy. Sitting with their friends, talking, laughing. Smiling genuine smiles.

Why can't I be happy? Where did I go wrong? Why am I such a mess?

Ugh this is so stupid and such a waist of time. The person hasn't shown up yet and it's been ages. I was so numb and tired. I just wanted to cut again and then sleep..

Hey, that doesn't sound too bad.

I stood up and began to walk out when I heard my name.

'Natalie! Sit!'

Ugh, Vanessa.

I rarely get away with anything with her. She always has an eye on me. Funny how she never notices my absence at meal time. Or maybe she does notice but just doesn't care..

I sat back down, this time near the door so then once I'm allowed to leave I can get out before anyone else. I put my headphones back on with Warrior playing. I love this song. There's so much meaning behind it.

Demi and this song honestly saved my life.

Wait, Demi? What?

No.. No fucking way. I must have already cut.. Too deep.. So deep that I'm delusional.

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